It was good! I love the storyline! Is this the end or is there more?

I like it, though it seems that some things are to easy.

Hey!Sounds good, I love the storyline!

Meg: Wow, look at this place! I wish I had my camera.

Steph: Stop being a tourist. We came here to help this place. Remember?

That was hilarious.

Hmm... I'm not sure what to think of Alena. She doesn't seem too... smart? Heh, I guess nobody ever said she was...

But I love their master plan. With the ships and all...

Steph: If possible, we would like to get one of the flying things, go above the lever, come down in the center of their circle, land, jump out, turn the lever of, get back in and fly away.

That, with the pause after it, was priceless. Thanks for the laughs - and write more soon! This is a fun piece to read.

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Hehe - good thing they didn't mess up that "mystical language"... Who knows where they'd end up!

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Wow, haha - they really jumped into that one! And they have no idea what they're getting into...

Ya don't find many plays like this on FP. Scratch that - you don't find many plays, period. (Sad, huh?) I liked the way you opened this with Steph and Meg arguing about Dayling Savings Time. The classic argument... Haha.

One thing I noticed is that there are very few commas, making it a little confusing to read, in some places. Like where Megan says "That's not going to help them now is it." (Insert comma between "now" and "is it?"...) More commas in places like that would help the lines to flow better.

I'm liking the plot, though! Getting into the action quickly... Gotta say, I'm intrigued. Keep it up:)

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you read my story so I read yours...it's pretty good, I like it!