|Reviews for Good Girls Don't Play with Fire|
| Jool chapter 1 . 7/31/2006
AWESOME! 5 STARS! TWO THUMBS UP! Your characters are very likeable. I mean, you wish you knew more about them. Lately, I've been very disappointed at the "negative" and "dark" characters appearing in new stories on this site. I'm very reluctant to read new fics. I'm eternally grateful to your writing skill and glad I took the chance to read this wonderful story. If any mistakes exist in this work, it's not noticed by the flow of the story. BRAVO! Take any criticism with a grain of salt, then throw it over your shoulder.
My favorite scene has Reese hitting the door as Cole was on the other side listening. Great, Cute, & Funny!
The ending was sweet, yet passionate. Perfect. Hope you write more soon.
Only one problem with this story. I could have read more.
Thanks for sharing. Jool
| adio kalinihta chapter 1 . 7/31/2006
hey guys, thanks for the reviews!i'll probably look at them all again tonight and edit the story as you guys shamefully, $2.13 is the wage. i'm a waitress (at a dingy pizza place, coicidentally) and they pay you $2.13. you have to make up the rest in tips. if you don't make enough tips, they'll cover the difference, but i've had to clean bathrooms once or twice at that wage.i'm really glad you guys liked it!
| Lily Llynn chapter 1 . 7/31/2006
pretty good! ) despite that it's "cliche." xDD
| prolific bunny chapter 1 . 7/31/2006
this was well written. even though there are a few errors here and there, it's nothing a little editting can't fix.
a wonderful one shot. I think i'll be looking out for any of your future stories. Be it short or novel length. again, great job.
| howw do you delete an account chapter 1 . 7/31/2006
| Sylvia chapter 1 . 7/30/2006
I like ur story. Please update soon...
| Heidi A K chapter 1 . 7/30/2006
ah. amazing. i love it .seriously- icant wait to see if you make any additions. one word: fantastic.
| miss understanding chapter 1 . 7/30/2006
I like the opening. I can't say I've ever read a story that began with someone scrubbing a toilet. Throwing up in a toilet, maybe, but not cleaning it.
She's only being paid $2.13 an hour? Is that possible? I thought minimum wage was something like $7.50. Maybe I'm wrong, but that number seems rather low.
Okay. You've said kneeling twice in two consecutive paragraphs. You might want to change that. My suggestion:
"Stifling a groan as her calves ached from being in one position for too long". Rephrasing without repetition. XD It's a lifesaver.
OMG! Cole really does seem like a total d*ck. I can't believe he was going to pee in the trashcan. I'm quite glad that she locked him out of the bathroom - though he seems like the kind who might tattle to get her in trouble and put at risk for being sacked.
Okay, let's see: Here, where you said "How could he possibly be Wheaten High golden boy"
It should probably say: "Wheaten High's golden boy" since he does, in a sense, "belong" to the school.
I knew it! He totally ratted on her! *smirk* She should have kicked his sorry bum out of the restaurant in the first place. Of course that probably would have gotten her fired and not just a reprimand.
What a nice janitor. I can't believe he just let her in to make copies. Our janitor's really nasty and mean. He makes crude jokes and yells at the freshmen. 'Course, that could be because some of the freshmen hijacked one of the construction cars and crashed it into a palm tree. -_-;
I can't believe she shot him with a staple gun. Does he exaggerate much? Okay, I understand he was in pain but he shouldn't have scared her.
I really like the ending. I also like how they acknowledged the cliche. _~ It's nice to recognize things like that.
I liked your story. There were minimal mistakes, so I could go into the grammar. It was sweet and they stayed in character fairly well. Your vocabularly is quite good, too. I am impressed by how much effort was put into this story (unusual, for a one shot).
I hope to see more of your writing soon! Keep at it!