Reviews for dirt & desire
silently watching chapter 1 . 3/15/2007
i luv this so much, this is totally my style! i would say emo, but that word is used 2 litely & every1 thinks it is somethin diif'rent...W/e! i am so babbly...lol, not a word!

btw, just wondering, is ur name from the Evanescence song 'Hello'? luv them so just curious.

c u L8
AlyRain chapter 1 . 12/8/2006
A very good song. (Wish I could hear it in true form!) You used a lot of really deep metaphors. Great job.

-AlyRain
guess who 1st 3 dont count chapter 1 . 10/28/2006
they say when your heart breaks you can actually feel your chest ACHE. my fucking god i can feel it now, my chest is hurting and i feel like i'm going to cry and vomit and scream all at once and ha, this is my third review of this and every time i read it it brings me to the edge of tears again. . . . .write. and even if i was a pretty, smiling, normal girl with a boyfriend i would still feel like crying becaus oh my god you kill me with every fucking word and i don't care if every other word is fuck because honestly, it doesn't matter anymore. i know i'm not making sense but basically: this is killing me.

i promise i'll stop reviewing this now :) it's just ... FUCK.

the living dead girl
liz chapter 1 . 10/22/2006
Oh my God. Oh my God. This is perfection. I'm sorry I haven't reviewed this earlier. I read it and knew I couldn't say anything. It's over a month later and I still can't find anything to say. This defies analysis and thought. I cannot believe how much you pour into your poetry. I agree with your other reviewer: this breaks apart when you try to read it. Your voice is one of the strongest on fictionpress, and I think that is what sets you apart.
PM20 chapter 1 . 9/10/2006
I really can't describe how wonderful this piece is. The imagery is just so wonderful and beautiful. Each lines transitions so well. Beautiful work and thank you for sharing.
emergency room romantic chapter 1 . 9/10/2006
i have a feeling that more people didn't review this gorgeous song because they were afraid to touch it, or because they were left speechless by the pure power, the beauty. few writers can convey emotion and beauty and feeling and meaning like you can, and it takes tremendous talent. this is one of the best pieces of writing i have ever read on this site - it is simply stunning. that's how amazing it is. i can tell this is extremely close to your heart, and it almost shatters as i try to read it. people probably didn't know what to say after they read it. the words, the imagery, it's simply beautiful. you paint something gorgeous but so, so sad here, and it's amazing. i love this, i truly adore it.
contrast and friction chapter 1 . 8/18/2006
I'm on the verge of tears right now & I haven't cried in a while. This poem just destroyed every single line of defense that I've built. Why? Because, this piece hits so fucking close to home. It really does - this. is. just. perfect. There is NOTHING that I would change about this. How can you make alterations to something so raw with emotion and passion and pain? It's real. There's no "effort" as such in this. It IS you, it's just the core of who you are, and that's the best poetry - the poetry that just seems to write itself. & reading it made me feel as though I was drowning in an overwhelming torrent of emotion. God, it's just so beautiful. It's an all consuming piece. It's just .. I can't even find the words to describe just how much I needed to read this. It's just the perfect example of why I love writing as a means of expression.[faves faves faves - definitely]
eraced chapter 1 . 8/14/2006
thats beautiful, sad and slightly haunting.

chills down a ghost's spine. ~erAced~
Chaos Apple chapter 1 . 8/13/2006
God, this is perfect and painful and amazing...I'm just speechless-what is there to say? I love it, I think it's beautiful, and I feel as if I'm about to cry. How is it you rack up so many reviews? Oh Yes! You're an amzing poet.
gold against the soul chapter 1 . 8/9/2006
Very evanescence-y. Although melodramatic, it is different - perhaps the poeticness of it is unusual for a song. Good work.

- gold against the soul
xbreezex chapter 1 . 8/9/2006
Wow...I'm not sure I have the words to describe this. Splendazical? Beau-mazing? Wonda-lievable? It's hard to pick a favorite line. "the time thrown across the floor still/reeks of betrayal" "run while you still can, &/maybe you will be saved from this/"This was stong...heavy...I...this was beautiful, truly beautiful. Flippin' awesome if you will.
the-foresight chapter 1 . 8/9/2006
Good poem, lots of cool imagery especially the mirror shifting fire and water". Nice work, and thanks for reviewing mine, I guess you're right, there isn't much emotion. But there wasn't really meant to be any. It's more about somebody looking at the world and commenting on what he sees. or something like that. Thanks again.
a lonely september chapter 1 . 8/9/2006
oh jesus, this is the greatest thing that i've read lately. i just love it. you're one of my favorite writers on this site, truly you are. & this poem, god, it's just so beautifully written, so sad, so... everything. iloveit. it's being added to my favorite stories, because hell i just love it. and ihavent been reading a lot of poetry lately, but im so glad i got to this peice cos i love it.
by His blood chapter 1 . 8/8/2006
...

...

this poem is absolutely ... amazing. it is so incredibly beautiful, i swear it made me want to cry. i don't know what to say, i don't know where to start. it's so heavy with meaning and pain and there's not much i can say. 'hush, love, don't cry so loudly/the light's so heavy/around you & i still ache inside' - one of the most perfect beginnings i've ever read. this entire poem is just filled with perfect, beautiful lines just screaming, so much meaning and it's just beautiful. 'as i watch the shadows embrace/each breath you take/hide it away from me in night' - this is absolutely incredible. so, so beautiful. it just ... i feel like i'm going to cry. 'sometimes you only/get one chance to say goodbye.../(are you sure they can hear you?)' that is just absolutely beautiful. all of this is amazingly beautiful. 'these open wounds break under cover/the ground is a mirror shifting fire & water/& i'm sorry, but you can't go home.' so, so beautiful. this is just absolutely perfect. amazing. 'the time thrown across the floor' - one of the best lines i have ever read. that is amazing. 'still reeks of betrayal/i knew & still i didn't warn you/i never meant for this dream to last/so long' - even more beautiful lines. this is so powerful and incredible. 'there's ash/everywhere & i - i can't find you.' . i keep saying how amazing this is because it's true. '& sometimes you only/get one chance to say goodbye...(but are you sure they heard you?)' - the meaning, the sheer power and beauty of these lines is just breathtaking. and the chorus ... fuck. 'these open wounds break under cover/the ground is a mirror shifting fire & water/sunset bleeds across screaming skies/as dirt shaped like desire pierces our eyes' - oh my fucking god, this is amazing. '& i'm sorry, but you can't go home/i'm sorry, but you can't go home' - so powerful, so ... incredible. 'run while you still can, &/maybe you will be saved from this/(i just need you...)/run while you still can, &/maybe you will be saved from this/(i just need.../i just need you to be safe ... from this...)/' this is just raw, beautiful, absolutely AMAZING. so incredible. '& sometimes you only/get one chance to say goodbye.../(& i'm not sure you heard me)' ... so, so amazing. 'it's just that you can't go home' ...

this is probably one of the most beautiful poems i have ever read. words can't describe how much i love it. i'm left speechless and on the verge of tears. kait, this is ... incredible. absolutely amazing. all i can say is ... it's perfect.
ShadesofBlue69 chapter 1 . 8/8/2006
wow...this is really the format is a little confusing...which part is the chorus?just organize it a little more babe.
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