Wonderful! I love how you managed to pull off the emphasis of individual words, and how you focused on the emotions of the sequence, not the actions - that's what really makes or breaks a piece like this. Keep up the good work!

Ah Bollywood. Same plot for every movie, yet it never seems to get old. Okay, so maybe not the same plot...but you know.

Still haven't seen Fanaa though.

But, back to your story. I was very unhappy when it said, "Finis." I want it to keep going (not like that...) but you know. It's forbidden love of course...and readers love to follow that. But it was still fantastically written. I loved it. Wonderful.

Cheers,-Mishiema

Oh...that is so good! I can feel the passion! I love the stress implied by the italicized portions of the words too. Very stunning piece.