Reviews for Predator
Toyah chapter 21 . 7/21/2008
After reading up till this point, the story has really got me thinking. Usually I don't pay that much attention to the tiny details (seeing as they don't play a big part in the plot sometimes), but after reading some of your review replies, curiosity got to me.

Why Angela? What does Cancer have against Angela? What happened to Scythe when he was kidnapped by his dad, and why him? Why does Cairon (I believe that's his name) dislike Cancer? Will we ever find out what happened between the parents? And so on...

I'll probably be pondering over these questions for a while. I do hope that they will be answered in the last two chapters, or in the FAQ at least.

As for errors and such, I did notice that you do place commas in odd spots sometimes. I didn't see this as much in the later chapters, so that's good. (Either that, or I might be thinking of another story) The rest I won't go into, because I can't remember my thoughts on them.

Oh and also, will we ever find out the identity of the Predator, Consumer and Producer? I know that it might be pretty obvious at this point in the story, but I just want to make sure. Until the next chapter then. :)
Emerald123 chapter 18 . 7/20/2008
im half glad and hakf horrified. i always thought Lynn was annoying, but i didnt want for her to DIE!Especially not like this. Scythe has gone mad.
Emerald123 chapter 17 . 7/20/2008
i hate scythe and cancer. rayth all the way!
midnightxskiesxx chapter 21 . 7/19/2008
! you're story is sosososooso good! overreaction D nah, its brilliant good luck with the skow awards. btw how is bones illegal and how do you play? awesome story, you're a great writer, can't wait for the next parts D D D
wistful-ambtions chapter 21 . 7/19/2008
wow this a very intresting chapter
Emerald123 chapter 10 . 7/19/2008
Scythe, Rayth, Cancer, and the mysterious creepy stalker dude r related to the producer, consumer, and predator arent they?
Death Princess chapter 21 . 7/19/2008
ur a psycho
Emerald123 chapter 5 . 7/18/2008
interesting chapter.
Emerald123 chapter 2 . 7/17/2008
i like ur story. is the 2nd chapter in a dif time when their all older? ok it probably is. wel anyway...ur story is fun to read!
Keenon chapter 21 . 7/17/2008
So, let me get this straight: basically, Lou is only Angela's half sister; as in her mom cheated on her dad with Scythe's dad, and Cancer's the descendant of Eleanor's child, the one that all the fortune was supposed to be passed down to, but didn't, and Scythe and Ryath? Yeah, just wanted to get this out of my head. I just spent the whole night reading the story, and, honestly, it's one of the best stories I've read on Fictionpress.

Update soon!
personwithaccount chapter 21 . 7/16/2008
okay I just don't trust anyone anymore and i wanna know what's going on! NOW! :crawls to a corner with a heavy blunt object and looks out for the enemy:

completely stupid question (I know) but who'se Lou again? I swear to Jesus I get everything else but it's just been a while...
Waffle Rocket chapter 21 . 7/16/2008
For one, I loved Angela's talk with Lynn. It was so cold, though. But true. They really didn't ever talk about Angela. 'Twas Lynn, Lynn, Lynn. "I've lost my cat," "I'm going out with Scythe." I, I, I. I laughed at:

“Funny,” I mused. “We talk a hell of a lot more now you’re dead.”

In that little scene, I was really confused. I thought Angela had broken something when she rolled the dice or something. But I'm thinking something happened with the adults? I read the 'shrieks from behind' thing over, and figured unless the dice bounced or something, she wouldn't have broken something behind her. Angela, by the way, seemed to want to please Rayth most, until what happened to Scythe. Maybe just because he's more mature and she wants to be thought of as mature?

I thought it was REALLY weird that Mr. Butcher went to sort Angela's mom out, instead of her dad. It seems kinda weird, like Mr. Butcher and Angela's mom had some kinda.. thing going, maybe. The children? It doesn't affect them, contradictory to the “It’s always about the fucking kids! It’s always about someone else.” statement. They just kept playing.

Nice, there.

Angela is scared, but she seems to be pushing down her own feelings for Scythe. What I notice, it doesn't seem so much like she's actually thinking about him. She's making herself. It's hard for her to think about him, to be there for him, after everything that happened, maybe? Or, as Rayth says later, was it always like that?

This is a remembering process, I think. It's weird: Why is she remembering all of this now? It's all because Scythe's in danger again? Her chance for redemption. Because she didn't go after him last time, right? But she was there for him. And she kinda held him together in that time, because he even said that he felt better when she was around. And she just totally forgets Raythe. "Rayth, you're, like... so not important. Fly away."

No. But, hah.

God, and I loved Rayth so much in the beginning! I always liked him more than Scythe. I even still kinda do, but now Rayth is so.. eugh. I thought I'd throw that in there, since I was thinking about it. Rayth seems to be the mastermind, still. I still think that. And.. I still kinda like the guy.

Angela makes excuses for him. Or, maybe not for him. But she makes excuses to forgive him. She goes from not owing anything to him, to owing him at least something for all the years of friendship. No police, even. Pretty.. I don't think it was a good decision, but I understand why she made it. Don't understand why she decided to call Rayth, after what had happened before, but I understand why she didn't call the police.

I wonder if she went to meet Rayth out of wanting to get him to help her find Scythe, because he asked her to, or out of pure curiosity. I want to believe she went to ask for his help, but.. I can't be sure, with her.

Rayth doesn't seem to care so much about Scythe. At least, not as much as Angela does. Or maybe his caring is just a bit more grounded, and she's just more of the type to worry about him. Like, she really doesn't care, but she worries about him, more because of the good times she'd shared with him than because he was in danger. As Rayth said, he'd probably come home if he was alive. Though, I kinda don't believe that. It seemed more like he was waiting for something. Maybe he was still a bit traumatized?

Rayth wants to punish those who have sinned, now? There's a lot more to him than I think many people thought. I don't know if this is just me, but I definitely think Rayth is the most mysterious, interesting character in this story, just because everything he says comes as such a surprise, and he's just so deep, right? He understands things, and because of how.. passive he seems a lot of the time, I don't think one would expect him to know much. Though, he is quite the observer. I don't really know what to think about him.

Those questions Rayth asked? Yeah, I want to know the answers to most of those as well, though I think I'm forming the answers to some of them. Why did her father leave? Because he didn't love Angela's mom, and her mom obviously didn't love him. I can't imagine the answer to the second question. Why does his mother hate her mother? Because.. I think back to the scene where Mr. Butcher went to sort out Angela's mom, and not her husband. Maybe because of some kinda thing going on there. Why does her mother hate her? I think that's probably one of the easiest-because she's her father's daughter. Why does his mother hate her? Because she listened to Mr. Butcher that time, resulting in Scythe getting kidnapped. And I think Mrs. Butcher likes Scythe better than Raythe. Who are Lionel and his father? I think descendants of Eleanor, again. Why DID Lionel punch Rayth? I think I'd know, if it weren't for what he said immediately afterwards, and how they seem to get along otherwise, or at least.. in a way. How old is Lou? What..? That just.. threw me off, lol. Totally threw me off. Why wouldn't she know how old Lou is? Isn't Lou, like.. her sister? She looks like Eleanor, which makes almost no sense, because.. I don't know Angela's family, really. I don't even know the surname. That's probably because I read it and missed it, but I don't think so, because you seem to carefully avoid calling Angela's mom Mrs. Something.

Revenge is the answer. If revenge is the reason Lionel punched Rayth that time, then I guess I do kinda get it. Betrayal, hatred-given. Her dad isn't dead, then. And Lou's blue eyes? Then, maybe there IS something going on between Mr. Butcher and Angela's mom. Or was. Godd.. so twisted. And so, then, I was right-ish about Scythe's mom being a descendant of Luckas, as well as Cancer and his dad. She's trying to repent for her ancestor's sins.

I like Rayth, really-but I don't like that he's telling her that everything she did was out of selfishness. But, maybe it was. It would kind of make sense, I guess, though I just don't like to think of Angela that way. I think I'm attached.

Pippa hung from the cage? Pippa? Why Pippa? Of all people, why Pippa? It just seems important to me. Is it all about Bones? The rats, Scythe, what happened? Everything? God.. Filling the pit? With... bones? Why? It doesn't make too much sense. And who's going to find him? The questions that plague my mind. I'll put this in here: What I love about this story, usually the reader knows about as much as the protagonist. Here? We know LESS, it seems, and it's just amazing! You get away with absolutely everything, huh?

Has to do with filling the hole? This sounds stupid, but.. Heh, if it comes to filling the hole, empty it, dig a smaller hole, and fill it.
25ariel25 chapter 21 . 7/16/2008
Ah! Didn't he try to raper her before?

I'm still confused but omg I am awaiting the next update. *pokes you for quick updates*
AubriannaKnight chapter 21 . 7/15/2008
OMG... I hope Angela is going to be alright... In a way i feel bad for Scythe. This story still kind of confuses me. Are all these people intertwined(connected)in somekind of deviously twisted, and ingenious plot? I'm not sure who is good, who is bad, or if they're all a bunch of insanly unbalanced people.

Fictionpress hasn't been sending me story updates, so i'm glad that I found out about this chapter.I'm gonna miss this story when it's over.
hellokiara chapter 21 . 7/14/2008

Don't tell me Scythe cracked Angela on the head?

This has got to be the only story in the whole world that has me clueless! I reread it a lot to try to catch on and sometimes it clicks but other times I'm just so lost which means you're doing a wonderful job of writing this lol. Rayth and Angela talked about family in this chapter and I'm guessing there's somehow a connection? Lol I'm just taking a guess here and I can't wait for the next few updates. I'll definetly be voting for you on SKOW! Btw, Happy Birthday! Hope this review is good enough! ]
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