|Reviews for The Other Prince|
| turquoisewaters chapter 20 . 11/29/2006
i really really REALLY like this story. You kno, it's very rare that one finds a story where the protagonist is ugly, as in actually ugly, not insecure. He's also far from perfect, but he's so adorably empathetic! i heart will...
| Sari Eufemia chapter 20 . 11/23/2006
hey! this Story is awesome! i really like it! i love will! and bard and mort! that was a shock! the murdering thing...(shuders) but now the story is all the better... but he can't take the sleeping princess from Phil! what will he do? you just have to update!
| Alteng chapter 20 . 11/7/2006
Yeah, and I have yet to read Chapter 3 of White Chrysanten. I was thinking about it last night. Oh well.
Mort killing Will hit me for a loop. Then the queen wanting to marry her own son really got me. She is really one sick individual! (And I thought I was bad with having a brother and sister get married!) And did Phil even bring up the princess in this equation. He is due to marry her. What a mess.
I think that Will needs to keep calling Ryn elf babe! It works for me, and the bard can join them and call her that as well.
| Alteng chapter 19 . 11/3/2006
I ususally have several rewrites on my chapters before they hit this site.
Well, it is nice that the princess notices what is what. She does have vast wisdom in such matters.
The bard is being his irratating self. My bard has a habit of appearing in the most inconvenient places. I think it is a bard thing. One of these days, he's going to find himself tied up and left in the middle of a busy road to be runned down by a carriage or two.
Ah, good old Mort to the rescue. I'm certain Will is glad to see him. It is a taste of home after all.
| M.R.Sanner chapter 18 . 10/24/2006
Yay ! new chapter ::dances::
Awsume chapter . I liked this the princess seems really kewl . Aww poor Will .
Great chapter can't wait for the next one !
| Ofir chapter 2 . 10/20/2006
The prologue is excellent. It's short, it's sweet, and it tells the reader exactly what the story will be about. It drew me in to continue reading.
Your first chapter, on the other hand, was not very good. I find it is poorly written, it is was not that interesting, and the stereotypical weak, clumsy, awkward prince is annoying.
"Mother was, of course, of orge-ish lineage. Father wouldn't have married her if she wasn't very rich. She was the queen of her own kingdom - a very old kingdom. Mother had outlived many husbands, I shudder to think how many half-siblings I have actually."
What is an orge? Ogre, I know. Check your spelling. There are numerous mistakes. I didn't know Will was thinking until he said "I." Use something to indicate his thoughts. Like "Father wouldn't have married her, I thought with disgust, if she hadn't been rich."
The phrasing itself is awkward, the way he thinks is awkward.
The idea is extremely cool, though. I like it. I may read further, but so far this is my impression.
| Alteng chapter 18 . 10/20/2006
I bet Aurealis' jaw dropped at that. It is such a blunt line.
You did well with her character. She was able to refuse Will, but not come off as a frivolous ass. Ah, but what of the songs of the bard, and what will you do to Phil?
I didn't get an update for this story. I guess there are still glitches in the system.
| Alteng chapter 17 . 10/19/2006
Gee, the new fictionpress is already giving me issues. I read chapter/stories on the way to work and back, and I review a bunch of them at a time. Now I get told to wait 30 seconds! Oh well!
Anyway, to your chapter. I kind of expected Will to pass the engagement off to Phil. After all, they are the "fairy tale" couple. The bard got his song no matter what happens now. So, he isn't about to complain.
Now, depending upon whether the princess takes Phil or Will, this will say much about her personality. I am rooting for Will, but that could put a wrench in the works.
| M.R.Sanner chapter 17 . 10/18/2006
Sage looked very anime-ish which totaly rox ! And I thought he looked hot !
::GASP:: Will you idgit ! OMG , poor poor Will . Phil , is like the Marsha and Will is like the Jan*sp* . Marsha Marsha Marsha . Lol .
Please please please please update soon ! I'm like dying to know what is going 2 happen !
Oh and the new chapter of F,W&K is up .
Write on .
| M.R.Sanner chapter 16 . 10/18/2006
ah so the princess appears .WHy do I get the sad feeling she will love Phil instead of Will . ::sigh::poor will.
| M.R.Sanner chapter 15 . 10/18/2006
This is by far the best chapter out of the whole story ! I mean it ,the detail , the dialogue and the genious of having his father all mummified . The best chapter yet .
Omg the more I read this the more and more I love it ! You totaly rox my sox !
Oh I luvies the pic you drew of Sage it's just ::drools:: perfect ! The blue eyes are ...perfect ! Your art work rox ! Was that done on photoshop ( or painter ) ? If so great job . I sux at usin the comput .
Now I am off to read the next chapter.
| Alteng chapter 16 . 10/13/2006
For a weak screaming little princess, who has slept for a hundred years, she has quite a whop of a punch.
So, I would think that that necklace of preservation will work into this to save Phil from bleeding to death. And the rest of the castle will be up and about soon enough. Wonder what they will be thinking of Will's unconscious body.
| Alteng chapter 15 . 10/13/2006
I am not a poetically inclined person. So, I reviews on poems aren't so good.
And my bard shows up in Chpater 2 of Purple Unicorn. He is a experience. I thank you for trying it out though.
Ah, your chapter. I just wonder what would have happened if they had pulled father out of the thorns. Would the necklace have restored him?
They must be the destined ones for this story, or else the thorns would have succeeded in draining them. But, then again, if you kill them off, this story would have been awfully hard to continue, or it could have had some really weird turns to it.
| Alteng chapter 14 . 10/5/2006
Irony of Fate is a December story. That is probably when I will work on it again. Narrinda's birthday is December 4th. What can I say.
Nice cliff hanger there, and Bard is such a kiss up to Will. But I can see his point. Is that not why there are readers here. We are all tired of that dashing handsome prince, who saves the day.
| Esquirella chapter 14 . 10/5/2006
That bard is an interesting kook. LOL! Poor Will.