Reviews for Fallen |
---|
![]() ![]() ![]() only up to the 2nd chapter but i think its pretty good so far. but i got confused at the beginning because i assumed it was the girl's POV |
![]() ![]() ![]() ;_; Write more please, I've re-read this story and now I want more. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I love this story. I didn't see Gabe kidnapping Vera coming at all. Nice twist. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Do what? Sorry I've forgotten what we wrote about...? |
![]() ![]() ![]() I really like this so far. I can't wait to read more chapters. I was like 'no!' when I finished reading all you had up. I'll be keeping an eye on this story. :3 |
![]() ![]() ![]() I think this story has quite a bit of potential. I would suggest working a little on characterization. I don't feel like you get a sense of who the narrator is. Also some of the actions and dialogue between the two twins seemed a little to much like a pair of lovers seeing other off. I am sure that was not her intent I am sorry if I read it wrong. I loved a lot of the descriptions and the little creature named Rin. I would definitely be interested to see where all the relationships in this story go. Overall a very impressing start. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Why do they always get jealous of the brother? I mean, seriously, they can't see the family resemblence? |
![]() ![]() ![]() What? That's it? where's the rest of it? this was such a great chapter, although the dreams are confusing me so much. i love it! i can't wait to read more! update soon! |
![]() ![]() ![]() AH! WHAT HAPPENED? thank goodness i don't need light to type out this review, because I'm sitting here in pure darkness as my siblings play halo. anyway, you really didn't need to know that. what you do need to know is that THIS CHAPTER IS THE BEST! i loved the little intimacy between Rurik and Vera, especially the kiss! So cute! i love the ending, so full of suspense. i'm glad i can read more immediately |
![]() ![]() ![]() Aw! the two of them are so cute with the trust thing and everything! i loved this chapter! especially the mind link they forged. Great touch! great chapter! |
![]() ![]() ![]() AH! Greatness! I love it! What an amazing chapter! Good job! you know what I just realized? I HAVE THE NEXT CHAPTER AT MY FRIGGIN FINGERTIPS! boost! haha, yea, it's 12:20 am, i don't know wtf i'm doing at this moment. except reading a great story. yeah, great chapter. next review comes after i read chapter 6 and after a water break. D |
![]() ![]() ![]() I really liked this chapter. All the candy reminds me of JK Rowlings Harry Potter, actually. Haha, good job. |
![]() ![]() ![]() A little bit confusing at first but I'm getting the hang of it. |
![]() ![]() ![]() This chapter was great! As usual, i love the fantasy and how you write it. The dream was beautifully written! Sorry for not reviewing, I don't know why I haven't read these chapters. |
![]() ![]() ![]() yay! It's good. I really like these kinds of stories |