|Reviews for Iceslow|
| Halcyon Impulsion chapter 1 . 12/29/2008
What a morose little piece. So much is conveyed in this though, and I appreciate that you've used nature and seasonal language as in traditional haiku.
| no.peace.los.angeles chapter 1 . 9/18/2006
Hmm, what to say, what to say... I like the idea of this poem, but I don't know that your word choices were the best in the situation. And I don't mean the general poem, because the general poem is good. It's little words like "out of" and "down the" that kinda bother me. Though what do I know about haikus, am I right? The whole idea of "fragile voice out of sadness" seems weird to me. Almost awkward in a way. If that makes sense. Though I guess in reading it over and over and looking at the rest of the poem, I can see where you're coming from. Bah. I need to learn how to give helpful reviews. :/ I love the "pinetrees" bit, though I'd separate the words. Keep writing! :)
| ygg chapter 1 . 9/11/2006
Very dark and haunting in a way.. reminds of some of my old nightmares.. Poems who manage to send shivers down my spine are very rare, but this one succeeded richly.. Brilliant work!
| TheNewUnderground chapter 1 . 9/10/2006
ooh, gave me the shivers. in a good way, I think. I love that I can see the image I get from this so clearly but I bet you - and everyone else who's read this - see something completely different. concise and emotive...great job.
| Aquafied chapter 1 . 9/10/2006
crash and cold
this makes me shiver
| MallowsWins chapter 1 . 9/10/2006
I really like the title. The haiku seems haunting, the imagery I got was creepy. I like how the haiku sets the rules but allows the reader to come up with their own imagery. Good haiku.
| emeraude-irlandais chapter 1 . 9/10/2006
As always, your haikus ring brilliantly true. There's something so poetic and ethereal about a voice "crawling down the/pinetrees in silence", probably because it's a paradox, but it works to create an image (in my mind, at least) of a white, pathetic wraith inching in subhuman grace down a trunk sticky with sap...so much thought in only seventeen syllables...bella
| greenGalilee chapter 1 . 9/9/2006
Oh... This made me shiver-almost like it was crawling down my arms and not the pinetrees. The silence stated in the last line just accentuates the voice that you describe, and the sorrow that it emerges from.
I like it very much.