And about here you stopped paying attention to whether or not the plot made sense. This reads like gobily goop. It descended into childishness and sloppy writeing. You gave in to the impluse to have your characters say the first thing that you thought of instead of what would be in character for them and appropriate to the situation. In short it suddenly reads like all your characters have the minds of 13 year olds at best.
However the story would be a good candidate for a rewrite with some actual thought put into the dialogue and character reactions. Best wishes. N.R.

Back for a re-read :)

I love how the parting words rhyme.

Hello,

Ive just spent the last day reading this non-stop through college and the early hours of the moning, and I think it's one of the best pieces if fantasy I've read in a long, long time.

Your use of the english language is damn well amazing, I'm still amazed at the high quality of it all and this begs me to ask, WHY ISNT THIS PUBLISHED?

This is ao much better than a lot of drivel out there, and its such a amazingly gripping story. The characterisation, the plot evrything was just perfect and I commend you as an author.

Thank you for such an marvelous read,
KR

that ending was great. Hardly anybody ever cleans it up that well.

amazing...
the best story since I discovered this site
congratulations

Please, for the love of KiiAmat, publish this book.
CreateSpace is free through Amazon.
I read this fully in 7 hours, stayed up til 10 am. What an incredible work of art.

Love this!

Just finished reading! This story is absolutely amazing! I can tell that I'll be reading this again and again.

What happened to the unnamed?

Ho hum.

Rofl ch 42
he inkeeper called him Dusk but he had not been there sonce his old master hmmmm am I wrong?

I read your story in a few days, I was so entrapped in it ! It's really great, the characters are interesting, the plot is well done, and, as english is not my first language I don't have the words to describe how good this story is.
AND the sex moments are great.
It's great work ! I loved it !

Stupid shit. I really, really was looking forward to this but it was beyond bearable. It's so confusing and there is little or no explanations provided to the reader when they want to confirm something. This story lacks certain details and clarity in some situations.

It also uses too much unnecessary descriptive writing in some so portray the environment or the surround with no strong plot. Waste of my time reading.

Don't know if you'll ever read this...but this is a wonderful story. I hated to see the it end. Kudos to you, Marinus. Bravo! Words cannot express how deeply this story had me by the throat and heart. I won't forget this one for a long long time. Where can I find more of your stories?

Beautiful. There simply is no other word to describe it. This story is by far the best story I have read in my six years on this website, and it counts in my top 3 favorite pieces of literature anywhere. The story starts out very interesting, but it quickly becomes more than just an ordinary fantasy story. It has a deeper meaning behind it - some philosophical questions are touched by the story. I hope you write many more stories. You are my favorite author of all time.

Thank you so much for this wonderful story!