Reviews for MasterCard Theory
Iris chapter 1 . 5/12/2008
Mad For Figs! You're drivng me insane (in a good way) i absolutly LOVE this chapter and i can't wait 4 more! PLZ PLZ PLZ publish another chapter
Amber Salgado chapter 1 . 4/22/2008
l likie the story continue soon what happens ?
j.c-chic chapter 1 . 3/20/2008
hi :) alex montgomery sounds familiar.. perhaps one of Myrika's main characters?
Cassie chapter 1 . 3/11/2008

I'm lovin it!

I like how you write, you add the little details that many young writers forget to put in.
incandescente chapter 1 . 1/17/2008
I enjoyed the story. :) It was well done, and there weren't any major mistakes that made me stop and pause, so that was good.

I was hoping for more explanation of Adam Bailey's disappearance and why his bag was on Connor though. Thought it was a little abrupt there, with Alex focusing all her energy on Connor.

However, I guess its because he's the biggest problem there and then, so the story seems like a stream of conscious kind of thing. :)

Connor's character seemed alittle out of place, with being a good team player yet so hostile with Alex. Raging emotions perhaps? :P

I will be hopeing for further updates! :) seems intriguing! Update!
okusei chapter 1 . 1/4/2008
This is a killer idea. Poor girl, having to date her brother's best friend to pay him back. (This is the part where you, the author, gets to laugh manaiacally and plot devilishly.) I can't wait to read more of it!
SadHappyFace chapter 1 . 12/31/2007
hehe. funny. I like Alex. And you write very well. ) good job
SapphireEyes16 chapter 1 . 11/22/2007
i luv the story so far , itz in my faves so update soon!
RisanF chapter 2 . 10/10/2007
I admit it: this is better than I thought it was going to be. I was worried about the bad-boy angle your story seemed to be headed for back in the first chapter, but I think the whiny behavior of your protagonist helps blunt that aspect of the story. It's not so much a story of a sweet girl falling in love with a cold-hearted bastard, but of a easily-irritated teen snapping at a somewhat-irritating guy. It seems to be balancing itself out so far.
Trinheee chapter 3 . 8/16/2007
very intrigued with this story line. please update soon! would love to know what happens next!
Shadower chapter 3 . 8/14/2007
so i've stalked you on quizilla for some time now, i read the old version before and i adored it to the point i was whimpering when you had finished it ;;, so i'm definately prepared for the new version, no matter how many times i read it, it will be like a new experiance :D
Chriistine chapter 3 . 7/18/2007
I just got done reading your story and have to say I like this version better. I use to read your stories on Quizilla. Well thats all, and I cant wait for the next chapter to come out.

lost of love

-chriis D
President chapter 2 . 7/11/2007
Ok, again, bad news first then good news:

The supposedly constructive criticism:

God, I was sometimes so jealous of Grace. About three years ago, I'd come to the conclusion that everyone who was racially mixed was really pretty. Just look at Grace and Brit. Grace was half German, half Korean. She had attained her mother's dark blue eyes, which added more color to her already vibrant self. As for Brit, she was half French and some other countries, and half Cuban. As for Liza, she's just freaking amazing at everything.

Err... your paragraph's kind of incoherent- fragmented.

First you talk about being jealous of Grace, and only Grace. Then you talk about how pretty Grace and Brit was. And your end sentence, Liza pops out of nowhere.

The commendation:

Uneventful? LOL, no. This is quite a chapter well-done, it made stuff a bit funner and more complicated: Both Dakota AND CAM HAVE to follow the rules... Which means Cam is also forced into this. LOL. And, great PDA rule which might collide with the James Rupert thing... it opens up to a lot of possibilities.

Great. Great. Nice.

Well, anyway, that is my review.

President chapter 1 . 7/11/2007
I don't know, but there's a slight possibility I may not want to hear every story about my brother's sex romps. Just a small possibility…

OKAY... Weird. So the possibility that she WANTS to hear every story about her brother's sex romps is actually BIGGER?

But anyway, I won't go into that. This chap's humor and plot compensates for that. :P By the way, good work, you've already built up the fact that your main character accepts the guy's good-looking... ness instead of denying it and denying it until it reaches a certain climax.

-Avius from Reviewers Found
punkrock13 chapter 1 . 6/18/2007
is this the story you had on quizilla? i thought i recognized this!
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