|Reviews for Bastions|
| Angel chapter 16 . 11/2/2006
Aw, poor Morry! At least Mr. Toyer's helping him out. Poor Toyer, too. Sheesh, Morry wasn't very nice in his old life, was he?
"He wondered vaguely if he had been this philosophical in his old life." The answer is probably no, but I like this line.
Nice job making Toyer struggle with the dialect. Makes the story feel a bit more realistic. I can't stand it when people wind up picking the language/dialect/whatever after five seconds in a story (you see it a lot with Sues...).
And I'm VERY glad to know that [BLANK] Tenser will go back to being our beloved Morrison Wence!
Very nice job with this chapter, Maddy. Can't wait for the next!
| Angel chapter 15 . 11/2/2006
Ah, and now Quill is really feeling the guilt. Her and Ethan agreeing on something...the world must be coming to an end. I love the part where she's giving him that bone-crushing hug. _ Also love the subtle mentionings of La Camille.
I wish I could run as fast as Morry...
| Angel chapter 14 . 11/2/2006
Nice chapter. Great dream sequence. Suitably strange, familiar, and creepy. Mr. Toyer ripping someone's throat out...eep!
Poor Morry. He really isn't handling this well. At least Quill's owing up to what she did, not trying to cover for herself. Selfless little slacker.
“And…I never had pneumonia?” Somehow, I find that line funny. _
| That Girl You Love chapter 2 . 11/2/2006
Wow. I *love* this. I'm super excited to read the rest. No critiques at all to give. Nice job.
| ELF chapter 16 . 11/2/2006
great job! I like how Morry is thinking. It's awesome! Toyer is the best! I love him! Still love the dialect. "He walked back to Mr. Toyer and let himself become Morry again." Great ending. Love this chapter. Toyer is the greatest. I still love him. :):)
| KaiaLeigh chapter 16 . 11/2/2006
that's god he's gonna be morry again. his old self sounds pretty bad.
| Angel chapter 13 . 11/2/2006
Forcing me to review has to somehow go against my First Amendmant rights, Maddy. Anyway, nice chapter. Love the funny little notes the mysterious Conquerer is sending Quill. Love the fact that the mysterious Conquerer is being very nice about the entire situation. Love the funny sounds you're making as I'm writing this. And you're really scaring me with all this talk about where the major arteries are...
So, it's time Morry hears the truth. Great.
| ELF chapter 15 . 11/2/2006
love it. "Quill, who never did anything, and Ethan, who didn’t care to, were no match for his speed." great line. hm...quill hugs ethan... "“La Camille’s really getting her kicks tonight, eh?”" hehe... "Mr. Toyer found him." great end for the chapter. I love Toyer...
keep up the good work!
| ELF chapter 14 . 11/2/2006
2nd paragraph, shouldn't it be "he asked what had happened"?
"It make him think...was loosing his mind" should be "losing" instead of "loosing".
Interesting dream. What is it with you and ripping people's throats out? "“Yes. Who do you think you are?” “I didn’t mean anything by it, I—”" hehe! so clueless! "“And…I never had pneumonia?”" great response! very funny!
Poor Morry. Now he really has no idea what's going on or who he is.
Great job with this chapter!
| KaiaLeigh chapter 15 . 11/1/2006
Wow amazing that Quill & than are kind of getting along at the moment.
| KaiaLeigh chapter 14 . 10/31/2006
Oh my they finally told him. I can't wait to see what happens next.
| Kenric chapter 11 . 10/31/2006
This is the first story on this website I've managed to push through. I was starting each one and losing interest quickly...the largeness of the site is kinda overwhelming. But after I read the first chapter of this, I kept going until what's up now.
One of the biggest things that I feel is that I don't really empathize with the characters. This is not to say that they're badly written, but that I just think they're mostly selfish. Which is most likely the point. I think the literary art of mystery is used well here. The first story sort of makes you want to keep reading to find out what the heck is up with Ethan and why he does the things he does. And certainly now I'm curious as to how things are going to come out for poor Morry.
In terms of English, very well written. I ran into a lot of stories with horrible grammar and such. Those are very hard to read. So hooray for that! Also, thank you for not overwhelming me with names in the first chapter. I hate it when people say, "This is X in the Kingdom of X in the Country of X warring against the evil X." Confuses the heck out of me.
I can't think of anything else specific to say except that I like it overall!
| ELF chapter 13 . 10/28/2006
hehe. i love the notes. great. but at the end of the 3rd line, don't you mean "close" instead of "closed"? "“He broke into my house,” he replied." so matter-of-fact. hehe. i still love how you call Quill "Slacker" all the time. "“Well…we could try telling the truth.”" hm...i wonder if they'll try...hehe!
Great job, as usual! :)
| KaiaLeigh chapter 13 . 10/27/2006
Glad you updated today, great story.
| ELF chapter 12 . 10/27/2006
Quill's great. I like Lenny too. hehe. Toyer is funny. I love him. Poor Morry. So sad... "“Shouldcha tellim wha happen’d.”" poor Quill...she thinks that there's a conqueror out to get her... hehe. i still love the accent...gee, i wonder who she heard... :):):):):):):)