Reviews for The Mighty
swoas chapter 22 . 4/25/2007
YEI! He's better! It was the stone right?
swoas chapter 21 . 4/9/2007
explanation of the key incident plz
swoas chapter 20 . 4/1/2007
SCORE! new chapter! i'm really glad that they escaped but the won't forget that medicine I hope. I'm sitting on the edge of my seat waiting for the next chapter. plz don't disapoint
swoas chapter 19 . 3/23/2007
Escape! Sweet! Great chapter!
Temariah chapter 5 . 3/21/2007
Hi. You know Chuggur. Well, I'm her little sister...

I like the idea, but some of the story seems rushed. What I mean is that I really don't feel as though much time has elapsed between when Ray fainted and when she woke up. This could be because you didn't really mention what time it was in the inn.

You write really nicely, but the first chapter especially seems to be a bit of an info dump. I noted that you said to re-read the first chapter, and I feel that if you spread the info around a bit more, we wouldn't have to re-read anything.

There are a few simple grammar errors that I noticed, but nothing that detracted from the plot, which seems very nice and in-depth. I do wish that you would have explained a bit more what exactly Seers and Nightrunners are. I'm still a bit confused on that, and Ray and the gang already met their first Nightrunner.

This may seem contradictory to what I said before, but you should have focused more on telling us info that was relative to the immediate plot instead of giving us a history lesson about the world and Ray's ancestors.

One other little detail that seems incompatible with the rest of the thorough plot is the subject of Brynna's husband. Why would he betray the group just because Ray's a female? Brynna married him, so she had to have had some faith in his love for her, but no, at the first sign of a rampant tidbit of illogic that he disagrees with, he just up and runs away to warn the seemingly evil queen of them and possibly get his love killed. Also, you didn't show the difference in the twins and Brynna's husband. Why did they so readily accept Ray as their commander while Brynna's husband ran off? Was that an easy way out of finding a plausible reason for them to go to Alban? Don't be a lazy author.

*cough*

Now that I am done with my hopefully-not-too-scathing- review, I would like to state that your writing reminds me of a Stephen King movie. It has a great plot and it's a lovely idea, but you're lazy and you don't take the time, almost as if you just want to get it over with.

I would love to keep writing, but I want to find out what happens next, so toodles.
The Six of Hearts chapter 6 . 3/16/2007
whoa, talking mice? very interesting indeed. ah, it's a trap! will ray get out of it alive? I must read on!
The Six of Hearts chapter 5 . 3/16/2007
yay! another good chapter! THis story is deffiantly one of my favorites!
The Six of Hearts chapter 4 . 3/16/2007
I like this story alot. It's a very interesting concept. Well, I enjoyed reading these first four chapters and will get right to reading the rest!
crazy writer on the loose chapter 18 . 3/15/2007
wow, that was a good chapter i cant wait to read more
swoas chapter 18 . 3/15/2007
aw sad chapter :(
The Six of Hearts chapter 1 . 3/14/2007
very nice. I like it alot. the way it's developing is a good pace and very smooth. I like the characterization as well. _
Apollo Versaeus chapter 1 . 3/14/2007
I am going to Simon Cowell you on this one because so many reviews have been submitted already that they must all sound pretty much the Here we go: I refuse to give you credit for being a good wordsmith, and the language was simply cut and to the point. Although too-the-point stories are often good, I couldn't help but become bored whenever you went into descriptions of scenery, actions, or moods. The appeal here in this story is the idea behind the words more so than the words themselves, but believe that is fine but once you start describing things we are all subjected to reading a rough, annoying, uninteresting, too-the-point paragraph that people don't really want to read and instead rush to finish it to read the witty conversations enacted between characters. The intrigue in the story is the idea that it is a medieval setting and the plot. That's all. No one wants to read this for the words. People want to read this to get to the plot and be done. I am sorry if I am coming on hard but really there was no effort in making the paragraphs run smoothly. If you take away all of the conversations and the comical parts it is rather a bland piece of dirtied cloth. In between conversation I just want to skip the words and get to the next person speaking in a ruddy Old English tongue (ruddy being a compliment).
swoas chapter 17 . 3/12/2007
i thought it had bn a while since u updated lol turns out i had just forgotten to put u on story alert. i still like the story though. i can't wait to see wat is going to happen w/ the dwarves.
My Delusions chapter 17 . 3/9/2007
First of all, I'm so sorry that I haven't read chapters 16 and 17 sooner, but I have been so busy with school over the past two weeks and that's why I haven't updated my story in a while. Next week is Spring Break though, so I have a mind to start working on that again. ;)

Anyway, I loved it, as usual. The fact that you used Norse names for the dwarves (or at least names that sounded Norse) made me happy since I'm obssessed with Scandinavia. I can't wait for the rest. Good job.
crazy writer on the loose chapter 17 . 3/5/2007
wow, very cool, socan't wait to read more
62 | Page 1 2 3 4 .. Last Next »