Reviews for Our Algebra
Guest chapter 1 . 9/17/2013
Ummm...that was awesome. I want this written on my bedroom wall.
YasuRan chapter 1 . 1/6/2010
Gorgeous. I just adore poems chock-full of imagery like this one!
Sarsaparilla chapter 1 . 5/27/2009
very...inspiring. to my muse. it's lovely, it really is.
Elephant-Artist chapter 1 . 4/19/2009
I liked the poem because it had a lot of personification in it. I didn't like the fact that I couldn't figure out what the title had to do with the poem.
BlackestOpal chapter 1 . 5/26/2008
I clicked on this because it sounded like a song by the Shins called Your Algebra.

I loved the poem. It has great imagery and I adore the way that it flows together, it feels almost rushed.

For some reason I had trouble taking it in. I had to read it twice because I just sort of got lost in it and began to read the words without really thinking about them. I think it might have been the style that you wrote it in.

It's an amazing poem.

"were sweet on this quiet-eyed girl who

you would peddle home to lay in bed with

and hold your fingertips against

hoping I might grow into you and your pale skin."

I loved that. _
simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 3/4/2008
you breath your confessions into my skin until... breathe

I like how you attach the cathedral and confessions and sins... and the image of a person as a sin balloon was really interesting

I also like how you continue with the being as one thing by saying "our mouth and our tongue"

The ending is really interesting as well... the bicycle image and how you wanted to grow into him... that was another really awesome image...

I really love this piece... I think my favorite part though is actually the title... how its not in the piece but the idea of you becoming one is algebra.. it was really creative

The only two suggestions I have are it felt like it could use a little more punctuations... some commas here and there and also the line "isn't anymore" and the line about the sun seemed to be too short and long respectively with the rest of the piece.. still it's a really beautiful piece
Haveri chapter 1 . 3/4/2008
Beautiful!
Imalefty chapter 1 . 11/13/2007
i like the beginning - cathedral, confessions, and sin... :) it's really subtle, but also not at the same time. :)

i like how the whole thing is two sentences. i don't know why i like it that way... maybe because it flows into itself.

hmm... one thing i don't like... i don't really have anything i don't like. basically, i like it. :) it's nice and simple. good job!

-Lefty
XxFallenxX chapter 1 . 11/4/2007
Oh that's really good. I love the metaphor of the cathedral and the sins.
Twilight Starr chapter 1 . 10/20/2007
"the sun ate our words"-great line.

Well worded poem.

Good job!

Twilight Starr
bittersweet.season chapter 1 . 2/8/2007
you have really nice low. it makes me want to rush into the next line. fabulous.
generically beautiful chapter 1 . 1/26/2007
your writing style is amazingly unique. i don't think i've ever read anything quite like this. beautiful.

christine
Prevaricate chapter 1 . 11/26/2006
just perfect. solidly perfect.
MizSphinx chapter 1 . 11/18/2006
This was (I can't say beautiful, I can't say gorgeous because everybody else has taken those words) absolute fantabeautifulous. I know it's an odd word but it's the depth to how I enjoyed this poem. It's very original and different from the others. I'm kinda tired of flowers and birds and seas, lol. Keep up the good work! *clicks* FAVOURITES!
no.peace.los.angeles chapter 1 . 11/16/2006
OMG, that is one of the most gorgeous pieces of poetry I have seen in a long time. This poem defines poetry. It really truly does. Every line is just breathtaking in its originality and the images are astounding and I am just awestruck by this poem. It is gorgeous and going on my favorites. Beautiful. Keep writing! :)
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