I was going to wait until the end of the story before I commented on this, but I have a couple of specific points to make about this chapter.

Besteth's sudden explanation about the mages' rebellion feels very artificial. He didn't show any signs of wanting to tell about it before; Lark wasn't asking very strongly. It felt like it was something that you, the author, wanted us, the readers to know, rather than something that Besteth wanted Lark to know.

My second concern was the way that everyhing seems to be about rape. Why on earth would the punishment for rebellious mages be to be tied up and raped by all the other mages? What if the other mages weren't attracted to the rebels? That kind of thing has never been used as a punishment before, in any culture: again, it feels false. Lark's past, on its own, is just about credible (although it seems surprising that he was sexually abused so much; he was intially presented as a normal slave who worked in the fields and suchlike, as I would expect to be the case for most slaves. You haven't described him as particularly attractive. Why, therefore, was he, particularly, singled out for such unusual treatment?); I felt dubious when you wrote that Sactaren was raped as well; added to this the punishment that was inflicted upon the mage rebels, and it all becomes just a bit too much. Not all trauma has to arise from sexual abuse. I would have thought that Besteth wold be angry at Sactaren for betraying the rebels, regardless of the punishment. And why does everyone have to be traumatised anyway? The story is largely about Lark working past his own experiences: by telling us that everyone else has undergone similar things, you make Lark's case seem less severe, and of less interest.

Finally, I'm not an expert in psychology, but I am very suspicious of the claim that the best way to help someone to overcome trauma is to put them in a similar situation against their will, as per last chapter ("Stuck"). This doesn't mean that you're wrong, but I think that you need to justify the claim in order to make it credible.

I have enjoyed this story so far, but will reserve judgement and further comment until I have finished reading it.

I am in complete and utter shock. Damn the ending kinda through me for a loop. A warning would have been appreicated. But whatever it took me a while before I got used to the ending so I waited to make my last review that much better.

I enjoyed the ending while it kinda leaves you hanging you don't force Lark's character change too much from the beginning to the end. It was a nice transformation. Naeven's character was the same. Rather than having them change from Black to White in 30 chapters. It was nice.

The ending was however missing something I'm not quite sure what but after waiting 3 days I figured it wasn't gonna come to me.

I really enjoyed reading this story and I wish you the best on publishing it. It would be nice to beable to have a hard copy that I can read anytime. One of the best story's I've read.

Can't wait for your next piece of work to come out.

Toodles DR

I have this feeling that he wasnt really asleep XD But Im probably wrong, because then we wouldnt have all this drama of them constantly misunderstamding each other

hm ... what shall i say ... "the end" ...

defenitely not fair! ... too many forbidden doors, a vampire-lord to be bedded, a lady that still has to gain some substance, a stable full of strange creatures waiting for salvation, etc. ... i think i've read the old version of the first part (long time ago) and ... well ... i liked it especially because of its raw and enigmatic quality ... this version - how shall i say - seems to explain everything (psychologicalwise) and (therefore?) in my opinion tends to be more predictable and a little bit too political correct in the end ...

anyway, i love your writing (envy!) ... and this strange little world you have created ... still so much to play with :O) ... keep going

steffen

, my sister is reading this story to and said you actually found someone to publish your stories. Is that true or are you still looking? And I think that is a very sweet ending. :) it makes me go Awwh. And you're definately leaving your readers wanting more. And I love all the character developement and aside from like I said Naeven acting weird in a few chapter (I think it's because you were trying to show his growing feeling for Lark and it was kinda shaking) I think you did an amazing job.:) keep up the amazing work and I'll be looking for the next story...don't take too long!

:) I liked the end, it makes a nice close to the book and leaves you with a warm feeling. Such a shame that Naeven didn't hear...OMG, I'm so sad! But there'll be more books, yes? But I'll have to wait! Heh, but I can't talk, I get lazy and don't write and make my readers wait. XP

About the book as a whole...well, you can see our lovebirds' relationship move along, then fall back some, then build up again, sort of uneasy, just like a real relationship! -turns into cheesy commercial- Get your's now! _

I think you're doing a great job, and those publishers would have to be Simon Cowell to not like it! Can't wait for more!

Ending? What? I'm lost! That can't be the end. I mean there are so many loose strings. So much I don't know yet. So many unanswered questions. There has to be more.

I love your entire Mage series- one thing I'd like to comment on though, is the separation of the 'books' I think that these two: Magebound and Magewise- are actually still maybe /just/ enough for one book, because of the lack of obvious climax and problem and resolution.

Even individual books of a series have to have these, or it becaomes a chore for the reader to buy a new book not knowing whether the story will reach some sort of conclusion or not. :)

Otherwise, I'm really loving the story, thoroughly enjoying myself watch Lark develop (btw, I can't see him as 20, honestly. I keep on imagining him as a kid!) :)

What can I say..? Hm, a very human ending if you understand what I mean. Yes, beautiful in the sense that it very realistic. You have always been such an author. Though the whole story itself is something grounded on fantasy, but the emotions and thoughts are very human.

If you had been the idealistic one, you could've made 'things' (cough) in the first few chapters and went on with it. But you thought hard about what would really happen in reality, so I think you did something very splendid that it touches us readers deep down, because it can be connected to something we may have already experienced.

It is quite beautiful, and the ending is a little delicate. I can't explain it. But one friend of mine said before: "The heart of a lover is like glass that even the way it shatters is beautiful." So, it's kinda like that. Very delicate and beautiful.

(cough) I think this is the longest review I've ever written my whole stay in this story. I will wait for your return and for the saga to continue. Ganbatte! (Good luck!)I will pray for your success on that publishing issue...

I'm sad that it ended. \

Wait one moment here... end of series or end of book? It had better be the end of book because I would seriously have to hurt you if this was the total end... god i would be so depressed! I do hope that you do write the next book when your ready! Best of luck getting the publishing!

Wow. I feel terrible for slacking off so much on reviewing. I have read every chapter, though. I don't think I've ever read a story that's quite as captivating as this one. You have lots of talent. Also, it was a very good ending. It left me wanting more without actually feeling like it needed more to be complete. I anxiously await the next book.

"Of course. I've always wondered what it would be like to bed a vampire-"

LOL! Oh, that is hilarious. Classic Naeven. I'm a bit sad to hear that this is the end of Book 2...err..3. You ended at the beginning of summer like last time. Is that on purpose or does it just happen that way?

Anyways, compared to Book 1, I thought this was...well...slower in the story line I guess. I'm not saying that it's bad, God knows that it's one of my favorite stories ever, I just think that everything went at a slow pace. And I love the ending by the by.

Okay, well, can't wait for Book 3...4!

Oh, and I meant to say...

Why are you posting the finale right as all my favorite shows are ending for the season? Now I have nothing to look forward to in the evening!

Damn May sweeps!

Yay, a feel-good ending... the kind that makes me go "Aww, so cute."

Yes, Lark loves Naeven and Naeven loves Lark and they're both stupid, silly boys for being so foolish about it. But that's okay, so long as we get stories out of it.

Out of curiousity, why wasn't Naeven mad that Lark told everyone he was going to look for a cure for the venom? I figured that wasn't something he wanted people to know...

I just realized I didn't review last chapter:

My favorite part was when Naeven thought Lark had been bitten. Finally, the man shows some real emotion! And good job for Lark, risking getting bitten to save other people (and how very foolish and typical of him).

Looking forward to the next one, even if it's going to be some time before you post!