|Reviews for Storybook Endings|
| Chocolate Herrings chapter 2 . 2/1/2007
Mm, I love all of them, but 'Dreams and Slumber' was the one I most connected with. How many times have I wished/longed/lusted for a spell that will let me sleep and dream for a hundred years? As many times as I've had my stomach clench in fear and my heart skip a beat in panic.
| eyes of sky chapter 1 . 1/29/2007
This is my favourite, the mix of slime and transcendent love it artfully balanced.
| Neither chapter 1 . 1/22/2007
Really beautiful. Like a twisted fairy tale. You've inspired me to read more.
| Chocolate Trifle chapter 2 . 1/22/2007
It ryhmes well and is pretty clever. *Thumbs up* :)
| Continuation chapter 2 . 1/21/2007
Gotta love a good ol' rhyming poem once in a while. Only concern is the last line where the meter gets all messed up. On purpose? Accident? Either way, it kinda messes up the flow, and for a poem about dreams, I would suggest flow as being a main component.
Content-wise, another great job, if I do say so myself. Tackling a concept such as dreams, whether in a Freudian manner or in just the normal abstract way, is always hard to do. This is one perspective on it, and it's done quite well, even with the negative undertone.
Question: the dashes in between stanzas is to break them up? You can edit in FictionPress editor to have no spaces in between lines, just as a side note.
Anyways, can't wait for more!
| Chocolate Trifle chapter 1 . 1/7/2007
Very imaginative, I love it.
| Hollywood Fix chapter 1 . 1/6/2007
Yeah, very good imagery used here. "he was as dashing as a dragonfly." I loved that. Very imaginative, very original. The only problem I had was the capitalizations at the beginning of lines, I can't tell if you intended this poem to be conventional or not, but it might be something you'd look back on. Nothing big. But I did love it very much!
| erisedveela chapter 1 . 1/5/2007
I like it, its...realistic.
| Forsakn chapter 1 . 1/5/2007
I LOVE how you gave it a very froggy feel! And the ending, just marvellous. Ten upon ten for imagery too. "She was perfect in the gloss of her slime" - my absolute favourite line.