Reviews for Uncharmed |
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![]() ![]() This wasn't bad. Admittedly the ending doesn't seem complete, so I'll check out the sequel :p |
![]() ![]() ![]() Aw this is the end? I loved your story. I have to admit I thought that Ella would end up not being human. I love her and Alex together. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Type your review for this chapter here... |
![]() ![]() ![]() Jill, I love you! |
![]() ![]() ![]() I LOVED IT! You are amazing! I want to read it again! |
![]() ![]() ![]() OMG! i love that kitten! |
![]() ![]() *sighs* I see this story hasn't been updated in a VERY long time, which greatly saddens me. I am generally picky on what I read, but this was thrilling and new for me, making me love it. Finishing it would make me exceedingly happy, although I am not sure if you even plan to. Nonetheless, I will keep my eye out for this story. :) |
![]() ![]() ![]() Awesome story. I really loved it! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Loved this |
![]() ![]() ![]() Thank you for writing a logical reaction to killing somone. It frustrates me when writers think after you kill someone for the first time, you're okay. |
![]() ![]() ![]() "You should leave catching suspects to the pros." "I did." I love this! So funny! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Ok one thing, I waited to finish this story before I reviewed it because it was already complete by the time I started it. I just wanted to let you know that was the most captivating story I have read on here so far. I was taken with it when I started it. I love how you incorporated all the characters into the story. I hope that you can get this published. If you do let me know and I will try to get a copy of it. |
![]() ![]() ![]() ok, it says alex will die of this fatal wound and all, but in this edited version of chapter 59, theres no fatal wound delt to alex that would show bone or anything. just ;letting you know that... |
![]() ![]() ![]() What was wonderful about this story: The humour. There were quite a few genuinely funny one-liners. However. You need to work on your characterisation; Ella was one of the worst Mary-Sues I have ever read on this site. She was pretty and kind and smart and loved by small children and all her peers and god it made me cringe! Furthermore, her character was inconsistent: her actions hardly matched your descriptions of her. To be frank, she ruined the story for me because she kept getting all of this special treatment, when, honestly, there was nothing particularly special about her except that Alex liked her. On that note, Alex's characterisation began to slip and become neglected towards the end, also. And the romantic relationship between them started out fun and exciting but fell flat after they got together - there was no passion or romance, it was like you just gave up. It actually felt a bit awkward and one-sided since you never delved deeply into Ella's feelings for Alex. Aside from that there were some spelling and grammatical issues and a lot more depth is needed to improve the overall story. Additionally, some planning wouldn't go amiss; the plot often went on tangents which were pointless (except to demonstrate that Ella is an irritating liability and Alex's sole purpose in un-life is to save her) and rarely resolved. |
![]() ![]() ![]() This story is absolutely amazing! :) It should be published for everyone to read, it was that awesome! :) Keep up the great work! :) Peace, Love and Happiness! :) ~Bubbly Girl |