Reviews for i long to be grilled cheese
Jennifer chapter 1 . 3/31/2008
This is my favourite of yours. I get the meaning and i love the comparison that you used. It's original.

-jenny-
felicia13 chapter 1 . 4/14/2007
Wow. Lots and lots of angry emotion in this. For the mere fact of its formatting, I don't like it as much as I might've had there been, perhaps, stanzas and more line breaks. But that's me, you know?

I remember vaguely a comment you made about having written this after I made a comment about something being a cheese grater against my soul. I like the connection. Yay cheese grater!

Felicia.
Chemically Induced chapter 1 . 2/10/2007
my goodness this is, in a word, breathtaking. there is so much anger bitterness whitehotrage and heart in these words. i like the format, that they are all smashed together just like what thoughts are like in the throes of fruitless fury. well, maybe fruitless. "cheese grater porcelain bowl nightmare" is wonderful fantastic. as you can prolly tell, i love word lists like that; they get across a frantic effective description. "but sometimes, just sometimes i wish i could/ smash the entire kitchen to fragments" is my favorite part. its a perfect climax for this. i can relate. this world is a cheese grater. excellent. :) :)

love, .
Moondog Dozier chapter 1 . 1/18/2007
True, honest and sincere. Kind of like a diary entry of reality. The comparison works well, as it is an identifiable visual, and a relatable feeling. The reader has to relate, because the emotion is so visable. At first I was expecting a sort of humorous work from the title, and was happy to see a personal favorite, "grilled cheese", put in a title, so the specific emotion of this was really intensified because as a reader I didn't see this coming at all. It's real, and heartfelt, and yes personal, but it is also a well thought out public work. I'm overwhelmed on several levels by this. Great write. Powerful emotion. I'm favoriting this because of the connection the reader must feel to the voice.
Banshee Junior chapter 1 . 1/18/2007
I sort of like your angst, it isn't just bare moaning and groaning, its pulling things right down to the disgustingly true basics and then making sure we cringe at it before we realise you're complaining. I especially love how you describe the "wholeness" of the cheese: "just a round of curdled milk".

This reminds me actually of a lawyer who is now conducting a certificate course in our college. While talking about obscenity being an assault on senses, he jokingly added cookbooks to the lot: "Just look at what you did to that beautiful chicken!" ;)