|Reviews for Silver Tongues|
| glimpses from an ivory tower chapter 1 . 5/28/2007
It's funny, but I could see this working better as a stanza in a longer poem.
Fix "bite-able" to "biteable"...the second line would work better.
Question: why is luscious in ' ' when all the other adjectives aren't? Stylistic emphasis, perhaps?
Overall, I wouldn't say it was one of your best, but with some work, it definitely could be.
| Midnight In Eden chapter 1 . 3/7/2007
First off, bite-able is actually a word so you can have it as "biteable". I'm not sure about so many question marks in the first two lines. Getting rid of the first two and replacing them with commas might work better.
I like your line breaks however. It's simplistic but not bad.