Reviews for The Feng Shui of Review
half-sketched.staccatos chapter 1 . 9/23/2007
konnichi wa

LoL... I love your essays. So far I've read two, and this will be my second one to be added to my favorites, LoL. You're absolutely hysterical while still bringing in facts and helpful hints. :D Kudos - and never lose your sense of humor! *grin*

I also try to make a point of returning reviews, although sometimes I fall into a bad habit of... er... forgetting (*tsk tsk tsk*).

I do have to disagree with you on flames, though. #1 - even if you wanted to, most people CAN'T reply to flames. Flamers tend to be cowards; all of the flamers I've had (granted, it wasn't TOO many, but a couple) were anonymous reviewers. #2 - I don't get insulted when I get a flame because most people who flame have worse grammar, punctuation, etc. than I do.

It was absolutely hysterical! I once got a review that I could barely comprehend! I was rolling on the floor laughing while trying to figure out what the heck this guy had written! It was on one of my stories from fanfiction, and I think I was cracking up for a grand total of 5 minutes. :D

"ew . whyy tha hell did u like change tha ending err watever that iss . its hella gayy ! damn i thinkk u should quit writing these stupid ** storiess . ur like not good at it . sorry but im juss speakin tha truth here . haha ."

You see? Even reading it now (it was sent in March of this year), I STILL can't figure out exactly what this guy meant. And, naturally, it was anonymous. I normall reply to the flames when I can and made a big joke out of it - why waste time reviewing so pathetically if it won't even insult me (which was clearly the point)?

ki o tsukete nee

JJSLAM2129 chapter 1 . 9/21/2007
*blink blink* I see my reflection, but there's no mirror! Oh, well, great minds think a like as the saying goes! Since I wrote something so similar (albeit less organized) I agree with basically all your points...

...except for the whole penname thing. Yes, a legible penname might be easier to remember, but I don't really consider it a major factor in attracting *readers* necessarily. People might look at your profile, but it won't influence to read anymore than the title and summary would. But that's just me.

So, I'm off to check some of your other essays. Great read! Thanks for writing this and for your review! Until next time! ( :: )
SamanthaNicole chapter 1 . 8/22/2007
I was profile-hopping and came across this essay, which I obviously felt compelled to read, since I'm obviously here ;-)

You make a few good points. I particularly liked this one: To attract reviews, returning reviews is usually a good policy. I've found this to be quite true, and I generally review anyone who's read my stories.

Also a good point: Reviews might draw your attention to things you haven’t noticed before.

This is especially true for everyone, including myself. It's SO true that sometimes, as authors, we forget that we know more than the readers, and sometimes get ahead of ourselves. It's always helpful when readers point out things you hadn't intended to give away, or things that need more explaining.

Thanks for the lovely essay. It was well-organized, and I got a lot out of it. Hopefully others will, too.


Fractured Illusion chapter 2 . 8/17/2007
"Most flamers of the ‘Critique’ variety actually mean to help you, they just have a bad way of showing it."

Too true! I have many times come off as more mean than intended :/ And I never aim to flame either, so you bring a very good point here ;

I liked the different review aspects. Haven't really seen those around much, so kudos on making them (and distinguishing the two type of flamers. )

So now to follow the guideline you made: What I didn't like:

Hmm... Well, maybe that the essay didn't really bring forth any too new points for me (aside from the two flamer types). It is however a work well done (I for one did not spot any spelling errors or anything!), so keep it up!
Fractured Illusion chapter 1 . 8/17/2007
I am an essay whore, for some weird, unexplainable reason, and found my way to yours! :p Woot!

It's really well done, with a nice, clean, basic structure. The addition of humor was good to liven up the spirit and all you said is too true. (and I also usually review while reading, ie, popping up the review window before I start to read :P)

There isn't much concrit to give though :/ Which pretty much makes me feel worthless (concrit is good! Bwah). In an attempt to save myself from worthless-feelings:

Maybe some more pointers? What you said is pretty basic and well known (at least it is to me...). Still time for more new stuff in the second chapter though! *goes off to read it*
Angelical12345 chapter 1 . 7/18/2007
Very nice. I admire people who write essays! I can never do it... Geez, I can barely manage to finish a story (scratch that.. I can't manage to finish a story *cries*). I really like that tip about opening the review box and writing stuff in as you go. A review froma fantastic reviewer such as yourself (flattery does get you places sometimes ;) ) would be greatly appreciated on my story, The Moon Child. YES I'm asking because no one ever reviews the way I want (a.k.a. pointing out every singly little flaw that bothers them a smidgen and telling me how to make it better). YES I'm high maintenance ;p . Anyways, just mentioning ahead of time, some of the chapters might be in a bizarre format (I'm working on it! No time!) so just ignore that... unless you prefer to the normal one.. then please say so (this is if you decide to review at all). And finally.. yes... I know... I'm practically a lunatic. But that's okay :) we're all a little mental here at FP aren't we? :P
LBA chapter 1 . 6/12/2007
Haha! Good for you. You probably won't believe this but I left that there for you to correct. The whole nazi/Nazi thing :) I couldn't help it!

Arright. So, there's this writer whose work you reviewed and she was a little peeved at the grammar issues in it. Naturally, I took a look. But I'm probably just different. I mean, when I read things, I read and review at the same time and I tend to type fairly quickly but I can catch all my mistakes. Do you ever get those reviews where the grammar and punctuation are wrong? It feels kind of hypocritical if you know what I mean? It leaves a bad taste.

Now about Word, it's not always the best indicator of grammar. I mean, it always gives me the wrong demonstratives. So it feels kind of awkward to read. That's what I meant.

I think that's pretty much it. If you thought I was polite, thanks.
King of Kings chapter 2 . 5/29/2007
Heh, sometimes it's very hard to tell the difference between criticism and attacking - I generally ignore criticism unless it's given KINDLY, because unless I see it has something I notice myself as being wrong, I find harsh criticism sounds more like the 'reviewer' is attacking me rather than trying to help me. I read all reviews, even if I see them as flames, to see if there is anything useful, however. I find even a harsh review as the potential to be helpful in minor ways.

Also, most of my critics tend to completely ignore anything that's GOOD in my story, which is why I see it more as an attack than anyone trying to help me. -shrugs- Also, some people act like they know more about your story than YOU do - someone actually argued with me about who my main character was. -rolls eyes- -snort- I find this highly irritating at first, and then it only amuses me.

I admit I don't usually have a lot to say in my reviews unless I find mistakes in the story - if there are none, my reviews are usually 'meh' reviews, or at least something pretty close. Heh.

Anyway, this is great - a guide that's not boring at all. You can add my story (any one of them you want, or both of them), to your C2 if you want. ;)

Thanks for posting!
Elizabeth More chapter 2 . 5/27/2007
Wow! I really like this! Definitely a keeper! You give really thoughtful suggestions here. I especially like your guidelines for reviewing and the FAQ's section. "Meh" reviews, haha! I love it! I've gotten plenty of them (and I must confess, written plenty of them at times when I've been really rushed, but I generally try to avoid them). Thank you so much for this essay; I'm adding it to my favorites so I can look back at it!

God bless,

Burnt Bread chapter 2 . 5/18/2007
Hm... I need to... somehow... recruit your brain. It manages to be a guide without being a complete bore, I commend you. I'm always for CC, but the flip side of that is what if the CC given is just not that good? I mean, sometimes, good works get critiques, and the critics totally miss the essence of what the story's about. People's adherence to certain conventional styles are very judgemental of those who try new things.

Congratulations on the guide, I am always on the lookout for things like this.

I do not require a review in return.

Formerly chapter 2 . 5/18/2007
J. Shelley chapter 2 . 5/17/2007
You go! It's about time someone set people straight on reviews. I especially liked the FAQ section in part 1. And yes, the "meh" reviews bother me too. If people like my work, I want to know why they like it. Anyways, great job and thank you!


PS. Can I please join the Sci-Fi/Fantasy C2? My story is under Fantasy, titled "Hurricane".
The Ferrett chapter 1 . 4/25/2007
I saw you in the C2 and HAD to check this out. God, it was a smile a sentence. ::)) Just for the cheeky attitude I'm checking out your stuff.
Dani P chapter 1 . 4/13/2007
this essay is interesting, however i disagree about the part where chapters should be somewherre around 1,0-1,500 words long. People like myself who are trying to write novel length stories have chapters with at least 2,0 words sometimes even 6,0. Also prolouges should be short compared to the other chapters, but there should'nt be a limit as to how many words, just make sure it isn't your longest chapter.

Also one more thing...never..ever..when writing an essay say "I'm going to write about _" or "In this essay you will learn _" it is a silly way to make the reader feel like your babying him/her. I suggest taking that line out since we already know what you are going to be talking about.
King of Kings chapter 1 . 4/10/2007
I always try to review, even if I have very little to say, and I almost always return every review I get. I find some very good stories that way - I especially look for the stories of those who have given me CC. 'Good' CC, anyway. Sometimes it shows me they're potentially good writers themselves. ;)

I agree with this completely, save for the whole length bit. Unfortunately for my readers, I tend to write long chapters - for 'Fire and Ice', anyway. I try so hard not to, but no matter what I do, they always come out so 'long'. I have 'never' written a chapter only 1,500 words long. ;) What can I say?

Your suggestions are potentially very helpful, thanks for posting this. ;)
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