|Reviews for Snowfall|
| easilyjaded chapter 1 . 3/15/2007
It's really interesting so far-I can't wait to see the tension build even more between the students and faculty.
| The Mumbling Sage chapter 1 . 2/21/2007
Accidentally forgot to sign in and saw that you don't allow anonymous reviews. It's more common on fanfiction . net than here, but anonymous reviewers still have something to say any once in a while. I keep them allowed just as a catch-all.
At one point you said 'heat' twice in two sentences. Not good, it breaks up the flow of the sentences. You saw what I just did, I hope.
Yeah, repeated words are especially obvious when they come at the end of sentences.
Your 'the first day' section seems to lack detail, but that's okay because it is a flashback. It does lack a feeling of inherant threat that we got from the first section, though. If you have kids looking out throughout the day and watching the snow get higher and higher, perhaps...
I just glanced out the window and saw snow. Now I'm scared. You shouldn't have written this in winter!
Hm...interesting. I'm imagining sleeping out in my school library...has big windows, would probably be cold. But I can think of warm nooks and crannies...
It sounds interesting, I like the idea. But now we have the thriller part hanging over our heads...
| AmberMarieee chapter 1 . 2/17/2007
This is a really good start, it's very interesting. I like it. I hope you get the next chapter up soon! ]