Reviews for With You
Moondog Dozier chapter 1 . 3/23/2007
This has a marvelous audibility, as it lends itself to song well with the word twists and usage. I think your overall point gets across with the attention to emotion that you intersperse throughout. I like the progression of sound that this represents. It drop-slips in some lines to sound similarities, which is a good thing from my viewpoint, because it continues the sound and the flow that you've established. Well written.
Hilmary-Oceans chapter 1 . 3/8/2007
Some of the things you write in the stanzas are a bit contradicting. The 'millipedes'. Do they represent every hair on your body? It's quite confusing, the descriptions you give of it. But you can really embody this strange disinfection you have towards that person you're with.


In the Rye chapter 1 . 3/2/2007
It's a little redundant, the imagry, and "vapid" but it's good otherwise.