|Reviews for The Bridenapping|
| Tetsone fuu chapter 7 . 11/7/2010
Character development is my weakness too but you seem to be doing well at it. Keep it up!
| Tetsone fuu chapter 6 . 11/7/2010
Crap i was afraid Oscar was gonna get shot.
| Tetsone fuu chapter 2 . 11/7/2010
I'm like dang! My mom told me to pray for my future husband and i'm like 16. Luckily i have been following her instructions on that one.
| Tetsone fuu chapter 1 . 11/7/2010
ugh. i hate it when people force people to marry people over silly people reasons like business ventures instead of following God. bleh! Good start off btw!
| MagicWords chapter 1 . 5/26/2009
Loved the first chapter! I'm seriously dying to know what happens next! You've got a great idea on your hands. I'll keep reading!
| Shadows.Dance chapter 6 . 4/20/2009
Ooh, I'm looking forward to the next chapter :) I just started reading today, but I really like your story.
| Mercyette chapter 3 . 4/16/2009
Bobbie Faye seems like a really sweet person, especially given the fact that she stayed with Evelyn and worked her over for over a year. That's commitment. I also thought that you did a better job of describing Bobbie than your other characters. You've put a lot more thought into her than the others, right? She just seems like a cool character to have around - especially as a friend. I also enjoyed seeing the longer chapter. ;)
I think the beginning of the chapter had your strongest writing in it that I've seen yet. Particularly when you described the estate so eloquently, and then turned the readers attention to how she hated it. That was well done, as it grabbed my attention better than anything else that you've written (and I'm not saying that the rest is bad, believe me - it's good).
I think you meant something different with this: "the same as she had been: a selfish and prideful on the outside and desperate for love in the inside." I think you need to take the "a" out.
Overall, great chapter. I plan on reading more when I get the time, lol.
| Mercyette chapter 2 . 4/16/2009
I'm excited to keep on reading. From what I've seen in the reviews and summary, it seems that Chris will have quite a bit of influence on Evelyn, which I'm eager to see how it turns out. He seems like he's a good, Christian man, so it'll be nice to see her get him in the end - hopefully. ;)
I really only have a couple of suggestions, and they're more personal things than anything. I would probably spell out the numbers that you include in the chapter - it takes up space and looks more professional, lol. I'd also like to see longer chapters in the future. I'm just getting into a swing of the scene and characters when it ends. It would be nice to have a little more information and time with them before going to the next part. Of course, I'm one for longer chapters, as you've probably noticed, lol.
You have some fun characters in this story and I can't wait until she gets kidnapped. I know that sounds horrible, but I think good things will come out of it. I think future reviews from me are in your future. :)
| Menginpeh chapter 6 . 4/15/2009
Oh, I'm glad Oscar got away without being discovered and I hope nothing bad happens to him in the future. He seems like a nice old man.
Hm...I wonder how Sam is involved? He's creepy! So glad Evelyn turned him down even though she doesn't realize just how bad he is though I have a feeling she's going to be finding out soon enough.
Chris still seems like a guy really trying to do what is right in his life and at work. Yup, I think I like him. Maybe he'll find out that meeting Evelyn isn't as bad as he thinks its going to be. :)
| nascarchick chapter 6 . 4/15/2009
This is a good beginning (or what I hope is only the beginning because I want more)to the story! I can't wait for another update! :)
| Mercyette chapter 1 . 4/15/2009
Ahh, you never can have enough Christian Fiction, hmm?
I love how you just jump into the story - something I tend to have a problem with, lol. It really helps to grab the reader, and with the short attention spans that most people on here have, that's a good thing.
I'm glad she didn't decide to marry him. Sam seems like a jerk and the whole, "I'll tell my father," thing cracked me up. What's he gonna do? LOL, you have a good first chapter.
Good luck, and I hope to read on soon. :)
| Chocolate Lover chapter 5 . 4/13/2009
Hi! I happened to chance upon your story, and I found it interesting. It actually is-you have a dramatic start with Sam and her overbearing 'rents, coupled with the Spirit's voice speaking to Evelyn. I'm curious about Chris, and I like the way you characterized Bobbie Faye. Also, Bridgette's questions are realistic. They did make me think as well. But, just a suggestion, you might want to put in more flashbacks Evelyn's past, like how she was converted, how she was like then and now, a specific struggle she had with sin that got her into trouble...so that she seems real, with a real past and real problems. :) But keep it up-I like your writing style and storyline; if you're doing this for God's glory, ask Him to help you with the plot and all so you can finish it successfully. :D God bless!
| Menginpeh chapter 5 . 4/10/2009
What an opportunity to talk to her friend about Christ and the Bible!
Now the body dumping was definitely a twist! I'm curious to find out who all these new people are and how they will play into the story.
| Menginpeh chapter 4 . 4/8/2009
I love Mamma Loretta! :)
Do NOT like her parents, but she is being a good testimony of her Christianity by honoring them. Obviously she can't marry someone that she doesn't feel like God wants her to no matter what her parents say. I wonder how she's going to get out of this. Looking forward to hearing more about Chris too.
| Menginpeh chapter 3 . 4/7/2009
I'm enjoying it so far. :) I was confused about something though - if Evelyn talked to her mom at the party, why is she dreading going home? Jaqueline who according to chapter one "Wanted the best for her daughter" doesn't seem to match the mom in chapter 3 though the dad, David, sounds like he would be difficult.
I really am liking Chris by the way. :)
Keep writing and I'll keep reading. :)