This is cool, thank you!

Hey, William and Mary! I went there too! First time I've seen it mentioned in a fic on here! It's making me ridiculously happy.

Hi there! So I realize you haven't updated in a while, but if you ever do come back to this story, I thought I'd put in my two cents.

Love the plot, but as you say, you're not really from DC. Allow me, as a native, to give you some tips:

-"the belt way" is not how it's written. It's just the Beltway. Single word, capital B.
-I realize it's integral to your plot, but there's no way the main character would find herself attempting to cross the Potomac R. in a paddle boat to reach a boat tour. The rentals are on the same side of the river as the boat launches for river tours. I don't know all that much about the private ones, but the public ones mostly take off from the Georgetown area.
-This quote makes no sense: "This left Mason White as my only choice for extortion, which explained why I was driving out of D.C. toward his mansion in Fairfax, Virginia. He'd be heading there in his private plane from Dulles International Airport, which would only take him a couple of minutes since Fairfax is near Washington"
First off, Dulles airport is in Sterling-even farther away from DC than Fairfax. It takes a good 30 minutes to get out to Sterling, assuming I-66 isn't completely clogged with traffic (which almost never happens...construction sucks). The airport in DC is Regan international, but it's smaller than Dulles. Also, I'm no senator, but I'm pretty sure it's unlikely that they travel on planes to their private homes.
second thing: Fairfax isn't exactly the ritziest part of the 'burbs, which is what I feel you were going for. It's more modest family-sized places and college apartments. You should look at either McLean, Chantilly, or Chevy Chase to find the super $$$ homes.

Another thing: it might be confusing for some readers that Jayne's husband is CIA but resides near Williamsburg, when the CIA headquarters is in Langley (another ritzy area, btw). It might be good to explain that Camp Peary is there (google it!).

I feel google maps could help you quite a bit in "exploring" the area, if you do continue with this story. You did get the distance from DC to Williamsburg right-it's about 2 hr 45 (I went to college there, and made the trip a lottt).

And wowww, long review. Sorry about that! Again, it would be wonderful for you to update!

Love the story! I can't wait to see what happens next!

You're an excellent writer!

This story is amazing. How many years have you been writing? I'm looking forward to the next chapter.

this story is so good and captivating. Youare an excellent writer.

I know you have not posted an update in almost a year but please do. This story is awesome!

Your story is great! I hope you can find the motivation to update sometime.

Love your story :) the mystery element in it is so good! But oh no this chapter was so sad! That poor baby! Update again soon?

It's almost been a year.

:(

OH MY GOD.

Okay first up I knew Gina and Anna were lovers hah! It's so obvious now!

As for the end of this chappie, does she have to get the financial info whilst she's held captive or after she's released? Can't she let the know on the phone what her situation is? They should be able to keep Nate away from them if they keep guard. And I wonder who the woman is and whose baby that was.

Keep up the good work!

gulistanlik

I wonder why she thinks this is all her fault? It's not!

Must read on!

Jerry is targeting her isn't he?