|Reviews for An Offering of Friendship|
| Gothic Lust chapter 1 . 1/21/2008
This is a beautiful piece. Though in your second stanza, last line- "An chameleon ocean"- Isn't it 'a' not 'an'?
I'm wondering though, since I read it aloud to myself, at the end of every line, did you want a pause? Since you only have one comma and no other punctuations, I was just wondering how you wanted it read aloud.
It's funny really, how AP Lit changes your view on how you read poetry. I used to pause after every line but now they say to read the lines fluidly, like a sentence. So that's the reason I asked.
I really liked this piece. You feel like you get the whole person, not just supposed friendship or the everyday acquaintance. Most people don't just want the surface or face value, it's nice to see someone extending themselves so openly.
Really beautiful. If only my friends did the same thing, offered everything, but then again, there are things you should keep in the dark... right?
"I offer you my mind
Towers torn down and rebuilt
A vast glimmering city of lights
Surrounded by darkness"
Not everything is meant to be seen, is that what you meant in that stanza? The person molds himself or herself to another, they won't always act the same to another person as they do with that one, the fundamentals are there, morals and what not, but your approach is different to every person, every friend and personality.- "An chameleon ocean"
It's either that or I'm reading too far into it. If I'm completely off base, I blame a sleepless night and no coffee today at all.
Do tell me if I'm close, I hate being wrong, it's frustrating sometimes.
| ginnyellen chapter 1 . 3/21/2007
ok... I've been out for quite a while... and I just read your essay... I'm sorry then if my revs are not as deep and "intelligent" as you might enjoy best... but I'm not a poet as you are. I do write poems, but I keep 90% to myself. And I'm not a professional or anything... I don't know how to use poetry terms correctly, so I don't use them at all.
I like your poems, that's it. I like the way they have an impact on me, and how you can get me to think things through for the entire day (sometimes it's more). I read your material when I have time... and sorry 4 being absent sometimes too long... Biomedial engineer is way too jealous sometimes.
This poem was amazing. Really short but straight, honest, simple, heartfelt... I smiled at this.
| I Found Myself At 24 chapter 1 . 3/20/2007
Your friendship means a lot to me, Matt. The gratitude is mutual. *hug*
| Summerdazed chapter 1 . 3/14/2007
as usual, it's another great piece of work.
hello...i'm back, heavily bruised by life, but thankfully not dead yet, sigh...
review me when you're free :O)
| Liebchen Rose chapter 1 . 3/13/2007
Aw...that's very touching darling.