|Reviews for The Suicide Poem|
| HiHelloMisterBear chapter 1 . 4/23/2009
That is beautiful.
I don't even know why it is beautiful but I pictured it in my head and just had to tell you that I thought it was beautiful.
Not the whole kid getting hit by the car but... the words.
I'm going to stop.
| Insomnia Breeds Insanity chapter 1 . 11/25/2008
You must have had some math teacher. This is beautiful, by the way. I want that kind of talent sometimes.
| softer side of apples chapter 1 . 10/21/2007
THIS TOOK MY BREATHE AWAY I WAS SEEING THIS AS I READ THIS; I FELT LIKE I SEEN THIS OCCURING IN REAL LIFE. I AM DRAWN TO YOUR WRITINGS.
| Jeannie-Redd chapter 1 . 9/15/2007
Really well written and very intense. Keep up the good work.
| Cross Rose chapter 1 . 9/7/2007
...Interesting...you said you got inspired by your old math teacher, eh? Interesting...
| Kindre Turnany chapter 1 . 7/31/2007
I liked "Useless" and "That smile of death."
The middle got a bit hard to follow. And I don't like "I alone." I don't have a good reason, it just sounds bad to me, awkward.
The end got a bit choppy. I don't know if you wanted that for some effect or whatever, but I didn't like it.
I think you overused the repetition.
| tuieri chapter 1 . 6/29/2007
sometimes death is a beautiful thing, and noone can say that it is wrong. sometimes it is not.
death is a horrible thing for the people who live.
this was good. kinda somber but thoughtful.
| mrs.miserable chapter 1 . 6/2/2007
I've read your personal profile (which I found quite amusing), and I thought I'll read some of your works.
"The smile of death" -What I have had in my mind was a more peaceful kind of smile people would have before their death if they had passed away with no pain, etc. (like a peaceful death at their bed). So this kind of smile of death is kind of disturbing in a sense for me. Especially that "perverse little smile".
Perhaps, he is dying peacefully.
| Tahlia Persint chapter 1 . 5/7/2007
This is too depressing for me...I do not like it no offense but I am an upbeat person. I hate poems that are about dying. Sorry.
| spacehikariangel chapter 1 . 4/30/2007
That was very poignant and beautiful in a tragic sort of way. I love the way it flows and the end line is just perfect!
| The Jynx of Kari chapter 1 . 4/28/2007
Seriously, the summary sucked me in. Then I read it and felt sorry for the train driver for feeling guilty but then I thought of the teenage boy and how...the last three lines really struck me. Amazing imagery [that's how you spell it?] and perfect representation of the thought running through the driver's mind. I wouldn't be able to live with knowing that I had helped someone commit suicide...even tho it might've relieved of any pain he might've experienced...
| xLilyx chapter 1 . 4/15/2007
:) I liked this. It's such a readable poem, i even ended up muttering it outloud to myself. I like the way its from the train drivers view, i don't know how you could live after seeing something like that.
| Sanseui-kitty chapter 1 . 4/7/2007
wow, i'm speechless. this is wonderful. i love the imagery. :)
| Princess Daenerys chapter 1 . 4/6/2007
...It swept me away.
| zz00 chapter 1 . 4/4/2007
Nice work, has a narrative feel. This is well-written, thought-provoking and expressive. All I'd say is that it feels more like prose than poetry. I would suggest using more metaphorical and euphonic language, because this piece (though nicely done in itself) feels more like a short story than verse. Well done however.
And thanks for your review. I appreciate your honesty. Oh well, it was an experiment.:)