Reviews for What Mommy Said
RoseFairyLady chapter 1 . 12/7/2011
That was scary!
Danzi chapter 1 . 3/5/2011
Oh wow I really liked this story! The way it was narrated in the little girls mindset, how snappy it was and it’s atmosphere of a real children’s story made it a great read. Well done.
LittlePieceLove chapter 1 . 3/4/2010
I found you on yahoo answers and got extremely curious.

This is an amazing story, I loved it.!

There are many things that are great with this story, like the way you captured the mind of a little girl, and the way things happened because she listened to what her mother say and didn't say, but I won't state them all because then this review will be terribly long.! D:

Thanks for the great read, dear.
angel-the-twisted chapter 1 . 9/14/2007
This is a very cute little story, with a very good moral! You should turn it into a children's novel it would do very well I think.
fle49 chapter 1 . 5/4/2007
how cute. do you always listen to your mommy? i know i don't. ha. sorry. good job as always. always nice to know what's going on inside that magical hair.
Callitha chapter 1 . 4/5/2007
Cute little story. The voice is done very well, very realistically a child's voice.

Some parts are a little confusing such as "Casey wondered if the big man's nose had grown when he broke his promise and started talking to her. Then she remembered that that was what happened when you lied and Casey knew it hadn't." It's not clear whether Casey is concluding that his nose hadn't grown or he hadn't lied...

In addition, the part where "Casey and puppy didn't see any of this" is a bit unsettling. Why is it tol dto the reader if Casey didn't see it? SInce the story's POV seems to be attached to Casey this one instance of Omniscient third person doesn't go with the rest of the story.

Good job though and keep writing! I hope to see a longer work soon.