Even as a mere snippet, You manage to portray the scene, the atmosphere, the everything... in a very like-able manner. I think the thirst for more that you've left your readers with is a bit cruel... but also fun. xD Great job! 3 Looking forward to reading more little snippets!

That's heaps good! A little short but definitely good. When you said that you have a habit of writing stories instead of anyhting particularly interesting does that mean that this will jjust stop there? Coz, I really think that this could be something good if you continued it as a full story. Anyway, if this will be a story: update soon! If not: good work!