ok, that was really good. you had an actual plot and storyline which most stories on this site are missing. it was refreshing. fabuloso! fantastico!

wow that was amazing! i know u said it was the end of the story but i really hope u make another chapter!

wow, this is really good, great even!

I think you did a brilliant job of writing this. Seriously. The details were mind-blowing, and so sweet. I loved Hunter and Kimi together, and how sensual they were. And the fact that he was a half-breed was an interesting twist and him being able to smell her "innocence". I loved this, and I can't wait to read more of your works!

so did she ever find out he was half demon?

Cute, omg, Hunter sounds like wowness smothered in 1337 sauce.

HOLY FUCKING WOW! I don't know if I could ever write a scene like that. I have no idea how other people can do it, but...wow. Your story/oneshot was just amazing. The only thing I didn't like was how you described how "skin smacked against skin". That just didn't go with the rest of the sex scene, that part seemed vulgar...that isn't the right word...it just didn't fit.

That was utterly fantastic, you are truly gifted!

ur an amazing writer

that was really good i wasnt sure at first but that was really good

Great Story. I just love it. I hope you write more like it soon.

Hey! I can't believe you're SIXTEEN! you write awesomely! good pacing and everything, keep up the good work! :)

Wow! That blew me away. You have such a talent for writting, especially being 16.

Keep writting. I hope to read more of your work later

You use cliche lines and wrong words.

This is very well written I like it alot keep up you writing you have great talent