This is a wonderfully honest and introspective piece. The last paragraph especially has it's own power of unromantic, realistic frankness. What we learn from relationships in real life is far more important than what we tend to absorb in books and movies.

I feel like I've read this before.

Did you post this on gurl a while ago? Because I know you from there.

This story was so sweet. :) You aptly conjure up images of youth and an awkwardness that I remember well. I really liked this.

the coffee fiend

Ugh, I totally understand, been there done that. Hopefully it's gotten better for you, great essay with good descriptions.