Reviews for Maria
Winterbirdie chapter 4 . 1/5/2008
please update soon!
Winterbirdie chapter 2 . 1/5/2008
don't delete this story yet! i got to read it! i want to know what this is about so don't delete it or anything! It's good so far, full of mystery and everything D
Julian Laverne chapter 1 . 9/29/2007
From what I read so far, the context of the story is very well written. You obviously put a lot of effort into creating a strong personality into every one of your characters-from Jed's caring personality for others to Maya's strong will and insistance of her rightful place as his girlfriend. It all comes across quite clearly. Maria is a very intriguing character indeed, I am very curious now to see what pulls at her.

The only part that I thought was awkward was in this sentence:

"He went into the shower to wash the germs from his body".

I've never heard of anyone saying that before, so I thought it sounded a bit funny. But other than that, it's a very solid first chapter.
cHaRlIeE chapter 4 . 8/26/2007
Excellent, but a little confusing at first. Try to make the links to the rest of the story more obvious, rather than trying to be suttle. Do this effectively by making Maria think about what was going on, that will give the reader a bit more of a clue.

Really good, keep up the good work!

By the way, chould you read and review some of mine? i aspire to be able to bring my stories together like this
ThEmIsSsCaRlEtT chapter 3 . 8/14/2007
keep going! i can't wait for the next chapter!
ThEmIsSsCaRlEtT chapter 2 . 8/14/2007
keep going, keep going! this is awsome, i really want to keep reading!
Unknowning chapter 3 . 7/29/2007
Interesting chapter. I'm waiting in suspense for what Maria told Casey and Ryan. :]
Violet Rose Y chapter 3 . 7/26/2007
This was really good! Although i would have liked to see Maria but I'm sure that is where your getting at. I hope Ryan is okay...update soon. :)
Violet Rose Y chapter 2 . 7/25/2007
This is really good! I'm impressed. It seems to have a nice twist of suspense to it which keeps me wanting more. For some reason I picture Maria as Vanessa Anne Hugens. lol You know that girl from high school musical...lol Anyway, I think we need to have a deal or something since we both are at the same position in our novels. I could review your story every time you update and you ould do the same for me. We would have a definite review for each chapter. But, anyway. I love it so far. Hope you update soon.
Unknowning chapter 2 . 7/24/2007
I like this story. It's interesting. And you should keep writing it and posting, regardless of how many reviews you get. I've deleted many stories because I thought that no one liked them and regret it. Anyway, I really want to see where this story's going. The only criticism I would give is that you use exclamation marks...a lot. It's a pet peeve of mine, so maybe it's just me. Good job. I'll be watching this.