|Reviews for To Stay Below The Sea|
| Mrs-N-Uzumaki chapter 3 . 10/23/2012
This is possibly one of the most interesting stories I've ever crossed in fictionpress!
You're a very creative and talented writer!
| sierra chapter 14 . 7/8/2012
ooooh! i cant stand emily already! :(
| cashsmash chapter 26 . 6/28/2012
Oh my God, I seriously adored this story. I mean it. I couldn't stop reading it once I started it. You're a REALLY good author. You should try publishing. :)
| Arisa chapter 4 . 6/27/2012
I love this story! It's a really cool take on the little mermaid and you made it seem really fresh and new and not all tired. I love the characters, they all seem really real. ( I have a soft spot for Arisa because we have the same name...) Keep writing and good luck getting published!
| Jayde chapter 11 . 5/27/2012
This story is so fantastic! I'm not quite finished with it, as you can see, but I'm in love with it nonetheless! The plot is very interesting, and I can't wait to see where you go with it! :3
| Whatsoever chapter 26 . 5/22/2012
Ohmagawd I love this! :D this is so creative and i love the twist on the little mermaid. I loved Eiden and Arisa's interactions, they were hilarious but adorable at the same time.
One thing though, I was a bit confused at first about how he came back to life. Did he pretend or did he really die and she brought him back to life with the triton? So that should have been explained a bit more, I thought.
But otherwise it was amazing!
| Whatsoever chapter 1 . 5/20/2012
Hi I like the prologue a lot. Now i'm going to read more.
| Sabreal chapter 3 . 5/19/2012
I'm glad you didn't take her tongue away! I was aware that happened in the legend too, but Arisa just has the best lines and it'd be such a shame, if all the conversations she has from now on is one-sided, because she bloody well can't talk! :) The chemistry Eiden and Arisa have is sizzling. "His hand running up her leg slowly."
I always wanted to create sexual tension in my stories, and would go about it by writing long paragraphs. You, dear lady, have acheived it under 10 words :P I salute you!
| Sabreal chapter 2 . 5/19/2012
Oh, ok. So the dad really is a freak. LOL. I thought it was some typo, but when you clarified it here, it made some interesting reading! Really hope Arisa runs away before the 3 days are up.
| Sabreal chapter 1 . 5/19/2012
This chapter really caught my attention, but a tiny detail bothered me. You said the King fell in love with every descendent? As in he fell in love with his grand-daughter, great grand-daughter, great-great grand-daughter? Isn't that slightly...incestuous?
Oh well. Dear author. I will read on! :)
| sailorsweetart chapter 26 . 2/19/2012
That was amazing! I really loved every twist in this story, it always kept me guessing. And I especially liked Eiden and Arisa's relationship. It made me laugh alot.
| InkedGirl chapter 4 . 2/13/2012
Such a cute story!
| Abrasive chapter 26 . 1/27/2012
This was really enjoyable. You took a classic and managed to give it some great twists.
The characterisation was very well rounded - both Arisa and Eidan were quite flawed but still incredibly likeable. The only issue I had with characterisation was the reformation of Alexandria; I just didn't buy the whole in-love-with-Prince-Eidan thing, let alone the turning-over-a-new-leaf ending. At all. It was so sudden and seemed out of character. She was too despicable to ever become believably good, so I would have preferred it Eidan or Arisa had killed her with the dagger as opposed to stabbing Eidan. It was a bit disappointing, because I originally thought you had created two magnificent villainesses in Alexandria and Emily.
The writing was clear and you managed to create a lot of suspense and emotional turmoil, which was wonderful. I would have liked some more description of setting of both the sea kingdom and Eidan's kingdom. It would have made the story come alive more, in my opinion. Also, it would have clarified what time period it was in, which I was quite confused about. Some of the more modern-seeming dialogue and references (e.g. maternity leave and the phrase "That's cool") clashed with more archaic things (e.g. the use of horse and carriages).
Just a note: In one of the chapters, Arisa tells Eidan the time on the clock is 2. As she cannot read or write, and it's unclear whether mermaids use human clocks, I was left wondering at how she managed this.
All in all, a very enjoyable read.
| SoulsLight chapter 26 . 1/21/2012
I loooove this story! This is what really got me into fictionpress, so thank you! I'm glad Arisa is VERY different from Ariel in the Disney version ;)
| whenthewallscomecrashingdown chapter 26 . 12/6/2011
That was utterly fantastic. I have no words to describe how amazing this story was! I don't often review (though I know should) but this story was so amazing and imaginative that I simply cannot help myself. The plot was amazing the characters were amazing...everything was perfect. Well done!