|Reviews for Now and Forever in Secret|
| i'm not dead yet chapter 31 . 11/7/2010
| xoxlizzie chapter 1 . 8/28/2010
You did such a good job on the prologue! It was so good! I can't wait to see what will happen next!
| todo-mahem chapter 31 . 4/29/2010
gah ok I know I've reviewed this before but I read it AGAIN (I've lost count of how many times I've re-read this OTL) LOOL and so here I go just saying I STILL love it, never will stop!
I just adore Jayden so hard and Tory and oh god together, they're so meant to be it makes me sappy which is horribly fantasmic.
Anyway, xD onto the sequel. Who needs sleep when I can read your great writings? xD
| TinaLouise chapter 30 . 12/8/2009
I enjoyed this story very much. I don't usually go for incest stories but yours was amusing and the writing style was very different.
There are a number of spelling errors throughout the chapters and, if you are interested, I'm more than willing to edit them for you. I'm not a beta reader since I don't have enough stories/chapters to qualify yet but I often edit works for other authors.
I haven't checked out your profile yet, but if you have other stories, I will definitely be checking them out.
| ButterNuts chapter 1 . 11/10/2009
Wow...i like it..the first chapter is so true...
| Elle Winters 9 chapter 31 . 11/8/2009
Despite how wrong it is I loved it. It was absolutely beautiful. Your characters were brilliant and alive. It's a shame lots of people don't like reading about this stuff. If you had this much emotion in a story where thechstscters were a guy and girl you'd have thousands of reviews. In saying all this though, you have many spelling mistakes as well as some grammar mistakes which a spell checker can't really fix. Some way you spell words show that it isn't accidental, but the more you read and write, the more these mistakes will fade. Overall well done. I loved it.
| Swoonami chapter 31 . 11/5/2009
Whoops, you made a booboo.
When providing an address, you must space it out xD Its a bit confusing
| AudreyKW chapter 31 . 11/1/2009
i've been waitingg!
| Friday Night chapter 31 . 11/1/2009
I still read this story, but the website link seems to be missing. So if you could please e-mail me the website, I'd be greatly thankful.
#1 Fan- Aiden.
| xrebelmusicianx chapter 30 . 10/12/2009
Ah, so nice to finish a hell of a story. It was awesome, I'm gonna be honest though: LOTS OF SPELLING MISTAKES! But wtf, who cares. Great to the top point.
| Cassidy Valentin chapter 30 . 10/10/2009
It's me again! I finished reading your story in three days, should have been just two day though, but I save the last chapter to the third day. I forgot to say my thank you on my first review [like it was yesterday], so than you for writing this story. It really warmed my heart. I'm still looking forward to what you could recommend me reading next basically theme of slash and incest stories. My review comes in the next paragraph.
I was bothered too [like Jayden] in what Shane said [the thing of ruining his life even before he was born], I didn't quite understand the statement. I mean what was he meant when Shane said that? But all in all I really like the story and good thing it ended up well [not of a sucker for sad endings]. Keep up the good work! Hope on reading more slash and incest stories from you!
- Cyrus Jian
| Cassidy Valentin chapter 16 . 10/9/2009
I just want to say that this story is doing great and if you made some more story like this or know other writers who writes themes like this [slash and incest at the same time] I'm gladly to ask you to link those stories to me for me to read.
Just started reading your story last night. And now I'm in chapter 20 but took the time writing you a review about this chapter's flow [chapter 16]. My review is on the next paragraph.
I think that it was kind of fast [of Tory] to finally be willing to take Jayden as a lover, though in the last chapter [chapter 15] he said that he'll think it over and from that I thought that it will take a while before Tory considers him. I want to know what made Tory to decide that fast and now in chapter 17 he's making out with Jayden. My conclusion was even before he loved Jayden more than a brother but it got me thinking that he was a player [with girls] so how come he decided that fast to make out with Jayden. Is because he's drunk or something? Am I right or have a point with what I'm saying?
| PyroTech chapter 30 . 9/8/2009
OH MY FUCK! I FINISHED IT! rofl it was totally awesome
| zagraet chapter 21 . 8/25/2009
i think uke is a pretty cool wears mascrera and doesnt afraid of anything.
and now some constructive criticism: this painfully reminds of "my immortal", especially the resemblance uke-ebony/enoby, so much actually that, at first i thought it's on purpose. you may wanna do somethig 'bout that.
the secks was pretty hot, but a question plagues my mind: how come they never use any lube? that part of the male anatomy is...dry (not wet/lubed/ready for sweet love) so for uke sex should feel like "being plunged with a hot iron"- quote from a real person that's been f-ed in there without prober preparation. and no, sweat and precum are not good lubes.
besides, i just don't like the stories where the roles are clearly divided.
to accidentally make a typo or two is alright, but not in a story that where you're suppose to check and recheck each chapter before posting for a world to see. i'm not even a native english speaker and i couldn't help but notice them so what's your excuse?
the character construction is not as bad, in the first chapters. i actually could say that seme yas in love with brother for a long time way before reading it in the epilog, but then things go downhill. it's as if you get bored on working with them and just wanna get to the secks part faster.
you also have some minor mistakes: the part with the million dollar, no one yould give a guy he barely knows that much money to begin with, but then he goes and gives it to his friends, who are like "oh, thanks". lol wut?
and his hair is growing incredibly fast. is he related with that cursed girl from 'i want you'?
| ebonyskin237 chapter 20 . 6/25/2009
why do you spell a lot alote? Do you spell check your chapters, because there are many easy spelling erors.