Finally, a non-snappy romance. This is very intersting. I love is a very unuasual male lead in a romance tale. keep up the good work. How did you get the idea for this stroy?

My God.

You are good.

You are so damn good. :D I got chills! How frightening, how intense...but still so hot! :) I am so seeing this in my mind, the perfect horror/romance film (too few of those!). It's so good, I can't even express it adequately.

0_o This story is creepy and cool! GM is very scary O

& Is the guy who rescued Val really GM?

Looking forward to the next update _

Oh God that's so creepy. There's something so likable about GM but at the same time, you wouldn't trust him wiht your life.

Great chapter.

oh. my. freakin'. god. THIS IS SO GOOD! you are BRILLIANT! I've never seen something this good on fictionpress! that might be because I choose to read romance so I don't normally look in the horror section and all...but not only is the writing amazing... the characters are well-developed, the plot is EXTREMELY well thought out, and it's addicting! I have an obsession with horror stories and really messed up plots like this, (messed up in a good way, of course) so I loved it SO much! please update soon. this was brilliant.

so i've already typed up a review a few seconds ago but stupid ficpress glitches and i lost it... so i'll try again...odd

beautiful psychotic boys! lovely...well its just boy really but anyway i'm so glad i found this! haha

its kind of creepy...stalker-ish but its also strangely thrilling and romantic! well for me anyway... i'm just dying to know what GM's name is...if i was Val, i'd probably have fainted at some point already...hahaha

i think the whole thing is flattering in a demented kind of way...its...dreamy hahaha sort of and i'm hoping to see more of this soon! please? got to try suicide chess some time...

hm...i apologize for the lack of capitalizations and punctuations if it bothers you and i just want you to know that i got hooked by the freaky first few paragraphs of the first chapter odd that since i usually find those tedious...hahahaha

well, cya!

Ettenna

The top hat made me thing of that peanut guy, with the cane and the monocle...oh I laughed. But then I got over it. Oh...you're being hunted. That's creepy. I'd be passed out by now, after hyperventaliting...I'd be no use to GM. I don't handle pressure. I like Val, by the way. Very real character for the most part. Bravo. Now that you have me hooked, update again soon. Which Im sure you hear alot, and it doesn't help your busy schedule...but still. Update. :)

- Selfish, Tainted -

First off, I would like to say that I'm glad you updated - because I was anticipating what was going to happen next, although my mom smacked me for staying on for over two hours - she told me that once I turn eighteen, it's Bon voyage! because she says that I'm not going to be one of those forty year olds who live in their parents basement.

Like that is ever going to happen ... right? D:

Anyways, now that my introduction is done - lets get down to business no? I like that James is supicious of Charlie and the other guest in white. They haven't proven themselves to be trustworthy yet nor have they proven themselves to be a threat. So that would lead us back to the whole, where does her alliances lay.

I don't particularly trust Charlie, since back in chapter three, it is kinda not so secretly pointed out that Charlie has a crush on GM. So, I'm sure she would be more than willing to help him out to be in his good graces. And anyways, James didn't see the white figure watching him from the shadows.

We don't exactly know who that is, so it could be from Charlie to Brent & Jason and then GM (Did I miss anyone?).

What's with the top hat? When I read that, guess who came to mind. Willy Wonka from the old & new version - but 2005 version Johnny Depp Willy Wonka.

I feel so.o.o.o bad for Blake. He was trying to be nice and start a conversation and Jason just shoots his airplane down - if that were me, then I'd be like, "Oh well FINE then! The wall holds a more stimulating conversation than you!," -Points at the wall- "See!"

Maybe I DO have a little too much extra time on my hands. Hehe, oh well.

["Abracadabra," James murmured.

He'd said it quietly, but he could have sworn GM looked right at him as he said it.]

James better stop before GM's patience wears thin and he decides to capture James next. But I laughed at that whole Abracadabra, because I was expecting a white rabbit to jump out - or a raven to fly out since it is GM. Or GM to break into song and dance, and all of a sudden - the oompa loompas come out of nowhere and start singing. Heehee, now I want some chocolate. But I have none D; Why does cruel fate do such a thing to poor ol' me.

I wonder whats with the whole draw a paper out of the hat thing. Is it kinda like the game Manhunt? I've played it before, but never gotten caught ... because I'm always the one who has to catch people.

I don't understand why GM led her to the door ... I thought he would punish her for leaving the room or something - but she does have to get back for the next round ...

["Have you ever danced with the devil, Val?"

What a strange question. "No..."

"Then dance with me." Suddenly, the two of them were running, tearing through the darkened hallways.] I love that part, how Val was frightened - I bet GM was smirking as he led her through the darkness, his element.

[The words You are being hunted dripped down the walls. Like blood.] Whoa, it could be ketchup but then again - knowing GM, who knows what it could be ... it could really be blood.

I love GM! I swear, there's no cooler or creepier character - other than Orochimaru (Naruto), Naraku (InuYasha) and Mr. Burns (Simpsons). Serioushlay, the way Mr. Burns says, "Excellent" makes me shiver.

"Excellent." :DD Anyways, I better get to my homework - see I'm a Grade A Procrastinator, everyone in my family has the curse ... well, erm only me D:. I don't know why I do it, but I just put it off until the last minute which is why I decided to review chapter five before I forget and then review a year later.

- Tainted Selfish - In awe of GM right now.

This is by far the greatest story I've read on fictionpress. It is intriguing, horrifying and enchanting all at once.

Kudos to you, my darling! Kudos to you! :B

And the blood comes, lol. Wow, this story keeps getting creepier! I get shivers when reading some parts of this. Wonderful job! I can't wait for more, keep it up and update soon!

Faith

ha, this whole "dance with the devil" reminded me of Batman D I hate the Joker, though. your story is great. really. even if there's something with chess (which I can't play, just like soccer) I'm hooked! Val seems like a real person. awesome.

NICE! UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE

wow dude this is intense! There's a song, whispers in the dark, that you should check out, I was listening to it while reading this, its kinda cool/creepy how it fits in.

Great chapter. Update soon the story is getting really good!

Dun duh Dun Dun DUN!