|Reviews for Forever me|
| simpleplan13 chapter 2 . 5/24/2008
I laughed to every joke he made,/The fact was it wasn’t really funny...since it's every joke it should probably they weren't
the girl that I was/am forever is... is what?
I like the story behind this... it's interesting. Some of the lines seem a bit long, but other than that it flows really well. The only thing is in some lines you have beautiful descriptions with the moon and the butterfly and others are less descriptive and more just to move along the story. I might work on balance that a little, even just throwing in a really powerful descriptive word in there or something so the stanzas fit together more... if that makes sense.
Anyhow it's still a really great piece with some really awesome descriptions
P. S. If you're bored today check out the Review Game's Review Marathon (link in my profile).
| doctor's diagnosis chapter 2 . 5/17/2008
This reads a lot more like a story, not a poem. It's got good content though, but for poetry it tells too much and shows too little.
The begining is really strong, though. It is all very imaginative.
| Walrus Lover 2.0 chapter 2 . 5/8/2008
I liked the ending because it was powerful.
I didn't like the fact that the girl seduced the man. Why are girls always seducing men? I can seduce someone just as well as you females can.
Think about that.
From the Review Game,
| A.M.14 chapter 2 . 5/5/2008
I liked this one even more than the first one! I think this is probably my favorite poem from you. Great job, and good luck!
| salvagedstars chapter 1 . 5/4/2008
The story's very interesting, and I can see you turning this into a full-length story. The revised version is definitely better than the first. :) It's full of anguish, and painfully sad. And it's very frank, which adds to its charm. Keep it up!
| A.M.14 chapter 1 . 9/22/2007
I loved this one. There was so much emotion put into it. Great!