Reviews for bay
My Dear Adora chapter 1 . 6/25/2008
I like the idea, it makes you think.

The purpose we're trying to get across is lost in the transcription.

I really like this line.

you remind me of him

of verbose and verbatim
Tytherpol chapter 1 . 12/1/2007
i like how personal this was.

even though first person means v little,

"used too many words

to make my point and lost it

which was the idea

I meant to get to the whole time"

said a lot to me.

actually, i'm not really sure what is going on in this piece.

and the shakespeare allusion sort of added a lot more to me

than maybe you intended it to.

i guess it described to me women's role in revolutions.

but, again, this one was hard. "you remind me of him" was a great line in this poem.

and so is the conclusion.

the conclusion simply owns. and it really gives the feel of the 'calm before the storm'

great job.

yours, -ty.
instant bliss chapter 1 . 10/2/2007
Wow. I'm glad I found my way back to these poems again, because I'm sure I must have looked at this before, and not really read it (the curse of fictionpress, sadly) and it's absolutely amazing.

I loved it all, but especially the first two stanzas, the Hamlet stanza, and the last stanza, as well as the line "...verbose and verbatim / colour..." and "I am still in your head". There's a peculiar rhythm and flow to this poem, a little disjointed, and entirely complementary to the content. I love the way you play with and /use/ language. Hehe. I'll shut up now. Great work, glad I got back to it.