Reviews for Torture on the Tortuous Road |
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![]() ![]() ![]() Since I seem to be the only one who has read this who hasn't been flamed by you, I'll give you my opinion. It seemed like you randomly threw in words you saw randomly in a dictionary, and it messed up the flow of the story. Just stick with the words you use in real life, it makes it much, much more realistic; and I'm sorry to say that none of this story is even slightly realistic. It's quite unfair to flame other works (I read some of them, and they were brilliant), when yours is hardly worth reading. Please. Don't leave flames. They suck. And they have no purpose except to make you feel powerful, like you're the 'top dog'. |
![]() ![]() ![]() you know what you can shut your trap about good stories. I quote you: "u suck losar just give up riting FOREEVER." I mean come on even I can spell writing right. Just because you can't write you should take in on other peoples stories. you can read my story from when I was 13 and it's better than your piece of crap. |
![]() ![]() ![]() It's actually not too bad. The title is atrocious, and the end is a little cheesy, but not bad. |
![]() ![]() ![]() From the reviews you received, I thought that your writing was going to be absolutely terrible. It wasn't. The only thing I would suggest is that you minimize the use of words like "whack" and thud". To about...nothing. This isn't a comic book and it shouldn't read like one. |
![]() ![]() And I quote: "u suck losar just give up riting FOREEVER." Excuse me? Please keep your comments to yourself, when they're decidedly false, like this one. It's incredibly rude. Thank you. |
![]() ![]() Wow, this person leaves negative reviews on stories that are actually good, but can't write worth crap! Hahahaha. What a moron! |
![]() ![]() ![]() I started to read this story but I couldn't make it through. You might want to stick with something else and try to improve you writing skills. I haven't posted any stories on here but i have on and though one or two aren't very good, they are better than yours. You could always ask for a beta to help and give you ideas. Thank you, aqulia14 |
![]() ![]() ![]() First off - The title is kind... well, it's lame. It conjures up ideas of some kind of dark comedy. Second - Your advertisment style is nothing if not clever. I wouldn't have read your story if you hadn't left me a scathing, unintelligible review. On to the meat of it. I have to ask, do you read Stephen King? You take some stylings from him, whether you read him or not. The italics, the repitition of phrases, all very reminiscent. The story is not bad. The pacing is a little off. I would cut some of the beginning, because it doesn't really do much to draw the reader in. Once John gets into the car, it starts to pick up. However, there's a huge jump in logic - how John automatically knows the cop is crazy and has murdered someone is beyond me. When John is trying to crash the car, "Now or never," is used a couple of times. I'd clear that up. I would also downplay John's injuries when he flies out of the car. You make it sound like he broke everything, but can manage to walk/crawl/speak/yell. On the converse side, I would INCREASE the extent of Max's injuries. Clearly, you were going for a Devil/God duality with Max, so he can take a crap load of hurt. And the ending, I assume that was the God/Jesus figure coming to save him, but was probably just some hippie that drives a van. I liked it, but there could be a little more... I dunno. Punch, I guess. As for the rest of it, it wasn't bad. I think everyone that reviewed it just has their knickers in a twist because you did that weird thing where you just reviewed new entries. But I enjoyed it. It wasn't terrible, and it wasn't the greatest thing I've ever read, but it certainly managed to entertain me and tell a decent yarn. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Haha! How shite is this! You can't write yourself so you point out everyone else's 'weak' points to make yourself feel better! I think everyone here can safely say that this guy has got some shit in his head. |
![]() ![]() wow...*cough* you call...THIS a horror story? wtf is wrong with you?...dude do me a favor...stop writing...please. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Well, all I can say is that I hope to all the powers that be, that this whole account is nothing but a joke. This was total trash. It was pointless drull that lacked any true point. People like you bring a bad name to a rather respectable place for writing. While I'll give you points for rather respectable grammer and punctiation. The story itself falls flat on it's face, I found it quite dull. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I am sorry, but you have no right to be flaming others the way you write. It's downright boring. That just really gets on my nerves. Someone named BUBBLES (no offense to the person, I like that name and that's probably not your real name anyway)said this was not scary and said you sucked. And what kind of summary was that? "Click plz." I was at your profile because someone said you were a shamelss flamer. I clicked on your story to see how you wrote. In other circumstances, I don't think anyone would be attracted to read a story with the summary, "Click plz." |
![]() ![]() Just because your stories suck don't rake it out on mine OK got that! |
![]() ![]() ![]() I have you on my block list, so you can't put your fames on me. Apparently you've been doing this a lot...you have little writing skill, I will just go ahead and say it. You have no ability to spell when reviewing, and you spend your time either flaming or posting 'stories' that make no sense. I think that you put the descriptions of the environment down alright, but overall this story just wasn't horror to me. I will make only one last comment. Though writing is a good pastime...I really think you should find a new way to spend your time. This is not your forte... |
![]() ![]() ![]() Er, no. Dull. Pulpy. Well, now I know and can unashamedly laugh off your unkind flaming. |