That was a decent story, and the swordfight with the alien was good. I think what it really needs to become great is a little more on teh details. Tell me about main character's hairstyle, build, scars and what his armor and machine gun and sword look like. The Ragnok also needs a bit more description. Is it a demon of some kind, or an alien species that talks in olde styleses? Otherwise, good job and I'll read some of your other stories.

Well, this chapter is different. It didn't have any fighting, or anything of the sort, just what seems to be a cliffhanger. That is not a nice way to wake up at all. The captors could have at least given him some coffee or something.

It sounds so...professional. I could swear you were in the military or something I loved it man.

Awesometastic. I see why it won. Nice.

I liked it, it's good. But there were a few written errors (not grammatical). Lik when you said he dove and shot, then was swept off his feet. I thought he was on his stomach or side, people don't usually dive onto their feet lol. Nice though. If you reread it I'm sure you'll see all the errors.

Hm, I imagine it would be creepy to go into a tomb and find some writing telling you when You're going to die. It's hard for me to figure out what's going on in these Tazurkal chapters since they're in such a strange order but they're still good to read. I figured the story would end at some point. Did you have all these chapters prewritten before you posted the story or did you write them as you went along?

The army of dark creatures seem pretty intent on killing them. If I was them I would just leave Tazurkul alone. He didn't do anything to them.

Aha, flashbacks. This chapter was kind of short but interesting. I was thinking someone other than myself would have reviewed this story by now. Well, have a nice day.

I'm confused. I was thinking the Tazurkal guy died from that arrow but then he's alive in the next chapter. Did he survive somehow or does the kratos lord take place after tazurkal?

I'll adress your last reply to my last review before I officialy start this review. Yes, I liked the fighting. I figured that it was the same guy in chapter 4 and chapter 6 but I wasn't sure. I was also thinking for a while that it was the same guy in fire with fire, that he just didn't have a giant robot. My favorite chapters so far have probably been fire with fire, sticks and stone, and yin and yang. I noticed some spelling mistakes in your newer chapters. I don't know if you're aware of their existence but I thought I'd point out that they're there. Do you play a lot of halo? I noticed that some of your vocabulary seems to come from the halo games. halo, arbiter, gauss, plasma grenades.

Hm, another chapter with giant robots and explosions. In the swordfight, who won? I was thinking Soulas won but it doesn't really say. Or is it meant to leave the reader guessing?

Just read the rest of the chapters. I like one spring day. Nice peaceful sounding name for a violent chapter. Futuristic, faster moving bullets. They should be packed with explosives as well.

cool chapter. The grammar is mostly good and the fight scene is awesome. The dialogue is good for the most part as well. I'm probably being too picky but shooting a barrel of fuel doesn't ignite it. Bullets aren't hot enough to do that and any sparks created would be on the outside of the barrel. That's just a myth perpetuated by hollywood and video games. It does provide an excuse for cool explosions though. It seems like this story takes place in the future. They might use a different fuel in the future that does ignite when shot. That said I'm still not going to try shooting a barrel filled with fuel any time soon. I wouldn't want to be proven wrong by having a barrel explode in my face.