|Reviews for Alice In Blunderland|
| Legacy chapter 1 . 6/22/2009
Hey Kay, told you I'd read it once my mind could process words and you have nothing to worry about.
Your writing is very good, it really does put across the question 'Is she insane?'
I especially liked "She noticed, suddenly, that her headache had vanished. As if it had drifted away with the butterfly."
That's my kind of metaphor. Using the elements to effect emotions is personification on an incredible level.
My only criticism is that you word clone her name too much. It chokes up the reading and seeing as how there are no other characters its more than possible to have said her name once at the start and then just used 'She'.
I hope this helps in some way and not only to point out where you can improve but, I hope, to make you feel a little better about your writing.
I have reviewed lots of writers many of whom think they're the next J.K Rowling and most of them aren't on the Bumble Bee Book for kids level.
You on the other hand, you have a good base for writing and your vocab is extensive. You should most definately seek to expand your writing, finish a few projects off and write further ones.
| Imperfecione chapter 10 . 1/16/2008
Well, well, well... SO that explains the blood on her fingertips. INterESTing.
| Imperfecione chapter 9 . 1/15/2008
Well, that did explain some-things. Sorry if this review sounds weird. Im still trying to recover from the shock your story gave me. . .
| Imperfecione chapter 8 . 12/10/2007
Alice is somewhat sickening. Fascinating idea. Is she crazy?
| Jack Argyle chapter 8 . 10/19/2007
Alright...I have no idea what's going on. I guess I'll have to wait till chapters 9 through 16.
If there's one thing i must congratulate you on it's capitalising on the style of your story. This is as surreal and absurd as they come and you've captured that down to the finest detail.
Oh and the exploding puppies made me smile. Not in a cruelty to animals way; they just did.