Lovely job. You've got a serious talent!

Keep it up. I'm loving it :)

~Carm~

YAY! Omg...that was sad about Kaily. Will she survive? AH! Go Edan! Fait cher Theron.

Good beginning. You have excellent descriptions of feelings and characters. This is definately going on my favorites!

Oh no! Stupid Theron. Love the rest though. :D Good job. .::thumbs up!::.

Even though it's been awhile since I've been on Fictionpress, I've definitely not forgotten this story. I'm loving it! It's this kind of story that keeps me coming back for more. So, I hope to see more from you soon :)

~Carm~

I like it.

I'm just jotting down my opinion as I go through the chapters so it might be a little random.

You have strong characters and I enjoy the overall plot. I like how you use the RSS feeds as foreshadowing in the beginning too. Smart. :)

The slang smack down with Geoff and Jared was a good contrast with the intense build up you had going. Nice break for my brain. Lol.

I think it would be better if you did a flashback for chapter 6-8 because the detail doesn't sound like something she would actually say. You've even got it in the right tense for it, just take out the quotations and slant the words or something. XD

In chapter 7, the middle paragraph is a bit overwhelming and would be easier to read if you split it up.

I noticed that some of your quotation marks aren't actually with the right sentence. Ex. "Aaron said as he counted the money,” I threw in..." You can probably pick it out. Just for future reference. :)

Okay, I've finished the last chapter and I'm hooked! I feel like I'm getting more into the story at the same time as Edan is.

You don't have to change anything if you don't want too and you can kaput my opinion.

Nevertheless, can't wait for your next update!

Have a great week! :D

ooh! this is fun! please please keep updating! this reads like a real novel. Twelve chapters in and Edan isn't a vamp yet. the suspense is killing me!

I'm in love with this story. It's been awhile since I've found a story that I just adored.

You've not only got beautiful diction and a way with words, but strong characters and a great storyline.

Keep up the great work :)

~Carm~

Good chapter. "Edan's chest puffed out a little" lol I can so see that happening in real life. Update soon!

Its getting interesting! Good job. Update soon :)