Reviews for The Hunters and the Healer
Ioga chapter 10 . 2/3/2011
Hee, I like your range of ideas! I was wondering what size the dragonets are, and whether they're long and slithering like "Chinese dragons" or more stocky like, say, Dragonlance dragons. I'm not sure if it came up in the story, I may have missed it.

And yeah, this is another story worth finishing. I know there's a ton to divide your time between, so you should pick what you like best and prioritize by that, but there's no need to completely give up on any of these! :) (I even got a first-review saying one of my stories offered nothing new; I decided to but it in the bottom of my continuing todo pile, but it's not a reason to delete it altogether - someone might come along and like it later, after all, you never know. ;))

Of course if you get new ideas, you can start them too! I'm not one to say that unfinished stories are bad, since pretty much all my stories are either one-shots or chronically unfinished. ;)

Minor nitpicks: The "Narrator:" tags I think were unnecessary, starting a chapter from the historical perspective after a character starts narrating it in the previous chapter is ok as is, without separately saying that there's a narrator voice behind it. Also, I think I ran into two contradictions: at some point early on the healer dragonet mentions he'll live through several healer humans, but later it's said that the healer humans live as long as their dragonets. Also, in mid-story it's said the healer human can't heal without her dragonet, but she both weaves healing words into her story, and heals during the chaos of the start.
Jade Carroll chapter 9 . 2/19/2008
Dragonet chapters are still my favourite. D
R.B. Mackensie chapter 9 . 2/11/2008
Cute story so far. You have a horrendous number of grammatical errors, but I'm not going to ruin a review by listing them. You've got a good sense of conflict from the very beginning, but I feel you need a little 'more' to really improve this story. Description (of characters, places, feelings; little quirks) all of which can help develop your characters, world, and setting, which you'll find to be very important as you become more experienced at writing. Feel free to IM if you have any specifics questions. Keep on writing!
Marilyse chapter 9 . 1/28/2008
Alrighty, so I read over this story. Even though it is quite long, I think it has a great plot. I could follow the story easily; I wasn't confused by dialouge or confused by the paragraphs. Flashbacks - they were well put in. Great Job!

Marilyse
Sentance Winder chapter 1 . 1/16/2008
Cool this sounds promising i'll read more in the future. I cannot critic this, at the moment but ill read on.
Esther Jade chapter 9 . 1/2/2008
Very sweet story and so imaginative. I found the language quite confusing at time but considering you're 13 I was very impressed. I thought the best bit was the first scene between Jarvis and Naria and the characterisation of Armit in this last chapter was also nice. Do I detect an Anne McCaffrey influence?

Just some grammar, spelling things that I noticed:

in chap 2, there's a "flea" that should be a "flee"

in chap 4, there's an "of" that should be an "off" (in "ripped off his neck") and it should be lost his "consciousness", not his "conscious"

in chap 8, there's an "oothing" that should be an "oozing"

in chap 9, there's a "quit" that should be a "quiet" (when you were describing Hannah, I think)

2 general notes:

1) You have quite a few of fragments where you don't have full sentences.

2) It's "prophecy" when it's a noun and "prophesy" when it's a verb.
dancinglight chapter 7 . 11/20/2007
Ok, good job so far. The narrator bit at the end should have instead been either a paragraph or a series of paragraphs showing the timelapse and growing friendship. Like a written montage. Keep going and post soon!
Jade Carroll chapter 7 . 11/13/2007
I'm really liking this story. I particularly like the jumps back into the past and am curious to see how this Lila character develops. Another Dragonet chapter would be nice, but I can understand if there's no room for them just yet. Looking forward to seeing how this story pans out.
Jade Carroll chapter 2 . 11/13/2007
Haha, cool. I didn't expect to see any chapters from the Dragonet's perspective, but I particularly like the sensing of the welfare of other Dragonets. The aging thing's kinda cool, too.
dancinglight chapter 6 . 11/10/2007
Yea! Great job! I love your story so far! Keep going! Post another chapter soon please!

Btw don't bother reviewing any of my stories, they're not good.

Anyway, post soon,

dancinglight
Aika101 chapter 1 . 10/30/2007
I like it so far.
sarenelsoria chapter 2 . 10/27/2007
I am enjoying your story so far, on chapter one however there is a small typo, instead of which you put witch