|Reviews for Blood Ties|
| Binkybaby chapter 17 . 12/29/2012
| Silver Huntress chapter 17 . 1/2/2012
Just found these stories last week and plowed through them. Wonderfully done and its sad that you havent actually finished the third in the series. However I loved reading every minute of it and am putting this story on alert just in case you ever get the urge to finish it up. Really well done and just amazing characters you have.
| Angelxoxo13 chapter 17 . 5/6/2011
UPDATE PLEASE. *unless nature something happened, i.e. You're sick or dying or worst dead* I limited myself to all my social network friends that if I didn't update for 5 years I might be died. :-/ I want to see Dana pregnant w Jamnis child n what happened after this. :)
| thealmightyspork chapter 17 . 1/23/2011
I was just wondering if you were going to finish this story? i have just re-read your stories and have really enjoyed reading them and would love to read more.
| eternallily chapter 17 . 10/13/2010
I really loved your two previous stories in this series, but I especially love this one. I can't wait until your next update.
| daydee chapter 4 . 10/21/2009
wow. i just realized i was mispronouncing ariadne's name. i was reading it ariadane for the past 2 books
| Jenniexb chapter 17 . 6/14/2009
Sorry I have been away for a while, was very happy to see you had gotten further on the story since several months ago when I was last on. Loving the magic explanations, and I agree Walker is a great antagonist. Hope to see more soon.
| Medieval-Rogue chapter 17 . 5/19/2009
So, I’ll open this by saying that I’m kind of… disappointed in the judges at FPSSA for not choosing Bad Blood as the Best Vampire Story, because Blood Ties continues some of the same things I’ve always said that I loved about your story, both as a book with vampires and as good read all around.
For starters, I’ve probably praised into the ground how much I love you use eye color shifts as expressions of moods for your vamps. But I just have to note here how creative a sentence the following was to continue this world feature, from the very first paragraph of this chapter: “I saw that the blue in his eyes was flat. He tried to throw a sparkle in it for me.”
I also liked that this chapter opened up straight to the point; the last chapter left us with a phone call from Ari, and this brings us straight into that situation, where Gavin is hesitantly about to tell us THE STORY. Especially since, well, Ari is taking such an active, strong role in the matter. She’s a great lover for him, and he for her, since she knows when to be tender throughout these kinds of situations, but also knows when Gavin’s just being a wuss. The little threat she gives him while grabbing onto his shirt front and the other scolding remarks beforehand about his stalling are definite evidence of this, and it’s very admirable, especially knowing what kind of a life she had before she met him – as she says in this chapter.
Similarly, while it’s not the point of this chapter, you continued to show Gavin’s character as a dad – first with Aidan’s game (totally cute and genius), and then later, sweeping him up to kind of hide his grief in the telling of the story.
I think it was very creative that you used Vlad as sort of an indicator to Dana and then to the audience, a litmus strip of the depth of Gavin’s story. When Gavin opened up with the … gasp-inducing statement of “Walker killed my mother”, paired with the knowledge we already know in that realm and about Vlad’s abilities at reading people… it was a very strong moment. Dana’s aura sight starting to kick in certainly added to this.
Speaking of which, the story itself was very….well, explanatory. I’m sure you remember the beta, and how most of it was just “O_O”, but that, I’m afraid, is about what my review is, too. Cassandra’s actions and those, too, of Walker all clearly influenced how Gavin got to be where he is now, and why he resents the Vampire so much. You did clarify the one part, about him returning home to Avery…. And, for me, that was kind of the key in all of this – not about Walker, but about Avery and Gavin. You also made it clear as to what happened to Eirene in that time. It’s just… a very… emotional story, and… well, it makes me wonder even more what Walker’s deal is (I’ve been saying that for chapters, I know, but after knowing THIS much….). Does he want Gavin to turn someone for him? Or what? _ I know you won’t tell me, but I’m making guesses anyway.
You described Gavin perfectly during the story-telling. He paced, he tensed, he touched his hair and gripped his jeans roughly – all indicators of stress beyond what we were already getting from the characters around him. His eyes, too. I particularly liked the end of this scene, when he was near breaking, stopping his speech entirely, about to tell Ari and possibly others the things he had done….when he just whispered in her ear – it was so beautiful. I know I suggested it, but BAH you wrote it so … emotionally well. And it was twice as perfect when Vlad, who could probably hear what was being said, yanked Dana out of there, surprising all! He’s so sweet…._
And so messy… I can’t wait until Pallas gets up in there…and…. changes his …. wily …ways… o_o…I’m joking and will stop right there. But it was a nice note for characterization purposes that I appreciated, that his bedroom is like his office. And also interesting that he wants to know how Walker was turned…because I’d like to know that, too. The little conference that Vlad had with Dana was also good for readers; it nailed home some of the key points and intrigues in Gavin’s tale.
And I loved it when Vlad said: ‘“C’mere,” he said, patting the floor next to him. “I need a heartbeat.”’ _ The following interaction between them was just… cute… Like… okay, he’s not a big brother, because he does flirt, though not as much as he used to… But it makes me, I don’t know… he’s a really nice soul to have gone through with the bargain set up with the feeding and all before, and I think that that helped bring them so close. Notably, when their close on the floor and when Vlad is chiding Dana for not thinking in the hospital: he doesn’t blur lines when he nails in the seriousness of what WOULD have happened, had he bitten her. Which made me gulp a little, I admit. Anyway, -Vlad and Dana… It’s innocent, if not brotherly, and I just really adore the relationship you’ve built between these two.
Dana kissing Gavin on the cheek was also really adorable. And you killed a few birds with the stone here, intriguing me and answering questions about Walker’s sexuality. Very, very interesting, for sure.
*giggles* I loved the banter about Vlad’s “biggest customers” and his “expression of …eclectic personality”. So cute. (Sorry I’m so sporadic with this review – I really should have written it when you first posted the chapter)
YOU WERE FINALLY FREAKING NICE TO MICHAEL! FINALLY! And you sly dog you did it in such a cute, creative way for being in first-person Dana POV. I loved it.
The whole scene (paired with some nicely timed upbeat irish music on my playlist) really helped close this chapter down pleasantly. We went through a kind of … emotional time with the story, but it was necessary, and you brought everything together at the end. Reading it, I felt like it was that one point in the movie where you can see all the characters together and smile happily, inside sighing “Aw…. I love this”. *huge grin* That’s an understatement, too. Because this thing doesn’t have a carefully mastered score and camera angle-working crew.
All in all, awesome chapter… one we definitely needed (especially Mikey _). Looking forward to seeing the next one, though I feel like things are going to get suspenseful soon here. Eek. Hopefully you won’t be TOO cruel…
| Medieval-Rogue chapter 16 . 4/12/2009
I know I’ve discussed this before, but I really love how you’ve taken to calling Gavin Dana’s “sort-of-brother-in-law”. It hits the spot better than “Ari’s Boyfriend” (for some reason that did need to be capitalized), and helps as a good pronoun in so many ways. I’m not sure if I said this in the beta, or ever used this allusion before, but the way you described Avery biting onto Gavin, without actually letting us see it… It made me think of Marius and Lestat’s relationship in Queen of the Damned (movie). Any two male vampires sucking one another’s blood, actually, might make me think of that, but in this case, it was the characterization and… emotion that hit me and made me think of it, even though they aren’t very similar at all. Trust me on that. I just… Avery came so close to biting Dana, and if Gavin hadn’t been on the other side, ready to tear into the elevator, I’m not sure he would have held out without Dana actively keeping him at bay. And the fact that Gavin was there was probably mostly coincidence, but no matter, the way you described him coming into the elevator just made him seem…so…vampiric. And (Yeah, I’m rambling, but were this a movie, it would be one of those scenes you remember with exquisite detail) he might be the son, but he’s still the sire…and I could tell when he was right there, bleeding for Avery… It was a very climactic moment and I’m having trouble praising it accurately.
Ari…. I remember when I really disliked Ari for being so… bubbly and obsessed with cute things. But being a mother has clearly taken her from being the girl crazed over fashion and being cool to someone who understands family and can take charge when she needs to. I like it a lot. I can honestly say that I LIKE Ariadne now, and I think Dana can too, evidenced by the fact that she called her “Ari” in this chapter and said twin noticed (as she handed her a duck-covered cloth for the bleeding nose). She knows when to leave a situation – like with Walker and Avery – and she knows when its, not obviously, the best thing for her to stick around – like with Gavin and Avery downstairs, in this chapter, after the blood loss. This chapter shows some more of the stubbornness that the women in this family have, and up until this story, I’m not sure that we really saw too much of it from Ariadne’s side.
This is small, but I still think it’s worth mentioning… I like that Gavin, after downing two bottles of SS wordlessly, asked Dana if she was okay. Some might think, well, duh, of course he would, but you could have written this any way you want, and the above things plus this make it all very true to the characters and world, but especially characters. We’re seeing this group act more and more like a family, and this part was one facet of that, which ties in subtly with the title of this story, too.
I don’t know how many times I will say this, but I’m probably not the only one: Eirene is awesome. Purely awesome. She’s a good boss, one that looks after her employees and charges and knows what they need without hesitating to take care of those things. And apparently good with kids, which is sweet alongside her firecracker personality. It was a smart move on Ari’s part to call the woman; it shows your world more, Ari’s understanding of Gavin’s life, and her ability to call on the right people. Which, in this case, is NOT Ghostbusters. (I had to say that).
I’m glad that you included details about the police and Detective Matheson in here. In a lot of the movies and books, a lot of action and damage goes on with seemingly none of the legal consequences, and in this situation, you remember the reality of things. Which I always love.
There are a few lines that I will continue to remember with awe in this series, and one of them is the following: [Dana:]“How much do you think it costs to replace a pair of elevator doors?” “Less than it costs to replace an aunt, Dana,” Gavin said. Like Dana, I wasn’t expecting that, and it was nice if jarring to hear him say something endearing like that.
Thanks for clearing up the reason for Dana’s parents coming into Rosen – I just couldn’t remember for some reason, and you did a good job of recapping it as it came up. It was very smooth and subtle.
Oh boy. My favorite part – always. Jamnis. For the situation, his entrance was perfect to his character – hurried, kiss quick, eyes darkish. He’s always been very possessive and has been very good about loosening up… But when things like this happen, of course he, as her lover, would get…. Ohh. Shudder-inducingly protective in the aftermath. But even more… stunning… is how sometimes unpredictable he is. I can’t tell you how much I love how he decided to show Gavin that the sire NEEDS to tell everyone what’s going on – shaking his hand for too long, kissing Ari’s cheek and asking her to talk to him… It was pure genius, and I love that Jamnis understands people so easily, even if he doesn’t always… well… socialize, he knows how to get what he wants or needs or feels needs to be done. In this case, Dana got hurt because no one can figure Walker out, and Gavin and / or Avery are the only people that can. Jamnis, and everyone reading this, doesn’t want Dana getting hurt again…so next chapter… out spill the beans.
Another small note… when Dana was writing her statement, I was actually thinking “Oh, damn, she’s actually becoming familiar with this process….” when she had her moment of revulsion / fear: “I did not want to get to the point where I could start comparing police procedures”. For such a small, factual detail, you elevated it well to Dana’s feelings. I think I would personally be angry if so many events like that happened to me within the span of a few years – Eliot, then Yuki, and now Walker, all different, but all bad and all resulting in a lot of damage, both emotional and physical. You took the opportunity to pound that idea in with just the short event of Dana recording her statement and stumbling, and to resonating effects.
Some more of Jamnis’ protective nature showed through later in the chapter, only this time it coupled with the small signs of…well, his maturity. He’s good with people, but Dana is hard to bully into things, which I think might have been more his style of tactics in, say Bad Blood, when he kept her at his place and wouldn’t let her leave, etc. Now, he wants her to be safe, and realized that the only way for him to get her to try to do that, truly, is to tell her and tell her how important that is to him. I liked the alone time, of course. And again, hearing Jamnis’ style of speech, we get reminded that this is a world of Vampires who have been around for ages – in his case, hundreds of years. Of course he’ll adapt his language, but it’s still complex and slightly more of an older, sophisticated dialogue style… perfect for who and what he is.
It was good to see Sirel again, and it hit me this chapter exactly how long they’ve been together. What, a year? More? Being from Dana’s perspective, we don’t really catch onto that… but I did this chapter, when Sirel broke down a little over Avery introverting about the event. I myself am wondering what Avery’s thinking.
There’s one thing I noticed… that I don’t’ think I caught in the beta, but Sirel comes into that last scene wearing sunglasses, but I don’t think she takes them off. Yet, Dana says a few things that make it seem like either the sunglasses don’t hide much (like watery eyes), or she no longer has them on. It’s not big, and I think I didn’t notice it at first because the emotions and events are more important and attention-grabbing.
This was yet another well-written chapter, especially as an ‘aftermath’ part of sorts, wrapping up the elevator scene and setting in some deep emotions and character-shaping events. I’m sorry this review was late, but here it is, and soon I’ll get to Chapter 17, where we finally hear the story from Gavin!
| rain-coat chapter 17 . 4/9/2009
Hey, so so far I'm really enjoying your story. After I read this one I had to go back and read the other two, and now I have a whole bunch of questions you're going to think are really annoying. So sorry, in advance.
Why didn't Dana just TELL Ari (second question: how do you pronounce her whole name?) about the deal with Gavin? Surely, Ari would not have allowed him to make Dana so miserable.
Again, all the times that Gavin's been an arsehole - why not just tell Ari so that she'll put a stop to it?
Um... what else? Now I can't remember. Oh yeah, if Gavin only looks sixteen, seventeen, wouldn't Ari look way older than him now? In a weird way? Also, same thing applies to Avery. If he looks like he's in his late thirties, early fourties (again, just paraphrasing, because I can't really remember), isn't it weird for him and Sirel when he looks like he could be her father?
Also, the whole 'Gavin is the oldest vamp in the land' thing recurs a lot, and I was just wondering... if he made Eirene and his father into vamps about a year after he was turne, aren't they ALL essentially the 'oldest vamps in the land'? I mean, when you've lived for thousands of years, what is one year? Seriously?
I think that's pretty much it. Oh, and I reckon you should write a story from Ari and Gavin's point of view. They're pretty cute, especially with Aidan, when I'm not trying to figure out the weird physical age gap.
But yeah, really enjoying your story(ies) and I think you've got a great plot line going. :-)
| HaleyAnne chapter 17 . 3/30/2009
this story is awesome! please continue writing it! and finially ur nice to mikey! good job writing it!
| Noctame chapter 16 . 3/19/2009
*grins* Of course. Because its a compliment :P
New chapter Please!
| FreedomStar chapter 17 . 3/18/2009
Aha, so we finally find out about Walker! What an ass...I was thinking all sorts of things about him but sociopath never really crossed my mind. I guess I would have to 'see' more of him to be able to figure that out.
Awesome chapter- I enjoyed it! Can't wait for the next one!
| Medieval-Rogue chapter 15 . 3/7/2009
First of all… Sorry this thing was so overdue!
I liked that the first scene showed more of the relationship between Jamnis and Dana. They talked about Mikey spilling about the vision, and Jam comforted her, but you really showed, just through this simple dialogue and interaction how well Jam KNOWS her. I also liked the mention of Dana’s Dad not knowing about the scars and that Mikey not want to tell him, either. It was also really sweet to see Jam offer to help Mikey cope, even if he didn’t flat out say it like that. *sighs* Proud Roman vampires…
And, since I talk a lot in this review about foreshadowing, his fixation on her bruises and his statement, “That’s what worries me, Dana”, was perfectly in character and also a good setup for mood and events this chapter.
In the next scene, key details remind us it’s night – thus, reminding us what kind of a world Dana orients herself in – a world of Vampires. You always succeed at taking us to this world, and I think you could do it in third or first person, just because you remember these great details.
It was nice to see the bright colors Ari wears let us know she’s better now, mostly. Better yet that Avery is actually going to stop by. The handwriting description for his note perfectly describes Avery’s personality. For some reason I really like that. I feel like this should be made into a movie, complete with a flashback to Avery’s younger days as a Vampire…I can just picture him in Victorian London, or earlier, wherever he was. Back to when he was a father, so we could witness the change centuries must have done to enhance his features of ‘parent’. Logical. Professional. Suave. They all describe him, but I bet at different times they differed in degrees, and such a small descripto as his handwriting style hit all those chords with me.
Mikey came out about being gay. O_O… I am SO happy _! And here comes a question, one I’m PRETTY SURE we may have addressed in email. Why is it that I, and other girls, find it so damned sexy when guys are gay? Well, really, not even the flaming gays or the fact that they’re gay….just the mental image of them checking out other guys and smoldering with desire, such as the image provided when Ari mentions Mikey at parties…. Reminds me of Yuki from Gravitation. Hot. Just. Hot. I don’t know. But I just thought I would mention it because I’ll BET that there’s another reader thinking the exact same thing…
AND YOU have to KNOW HOW HAPPY I WAS TO READ ARI TALK ABOUT TANNER! I think things are progressing quite well… This is one of those times where I kind of do wish this were a third person story just so I could see more interaction / perspective from my favorite slash pairing, but you still manage to wonderfully give us all the important things from first person, which is really hard to do. Hell, the way you do it is probably WHY I want to see it directly from Mikey / Tanner’s perspectives so much; you show what emotions are at work, and most importantly, you show these characters in such touching detail without ever needing to switch from Dana’s perspective…that I want to know even MORE… _ That’s what it’s like when a reader finds good characters, and yours aren’t good, they’re ineffably *grin* GREAT (I did not mean to cue Tonie the Tiger).
I noticed now, rereading the chapter, that there was a LOT more foreshadowing that just what I mentioned above. Right before Walker shows up, when Dana hits up the vending machine, her thoughts wonderfully prepare us mentally for what happens. She thinks about Avery- happy he dropped his pride to talk to Gavin and worried because of the way he had reacted at the mention of Walker. Which, of course, leads us right into another test of Avery’s strength, another very scary situation between him and Dana, and lots of suspense thanks to Walker. When Dana said / thought about being “woken up in the middle of the night because Michael was calling to tell me Walker was at his dorm, or Ariadne calling to tell me… I didn’t even know what”, it really honed in on the danger and stress that Walker’s presence was causing. And again, led us RIGHT INTO what happens – in this chapter, but also, I think, into the next (I still worry about Ari’s phone call at the end of 16).
And this just gave me shivers and speedy heart palpitations, even the second time reading, when you don’t even mention Walker’s presence, just animal crackers spilling and that “the man pinning her to the wall didn’t shift his eyes.”
I love that Ari slapped him. It’s really hard to get over how… creepy he is – more so than Yuki, by far, I feel. Maybe because there’s so LITTLE emotion here. No anger, no vendetta that I can tell. Just cold, hard hunger and greed. Elliot was the same way, but more in a trippy, I’m crazy kind of way. A little detached. Here, Walker is…present. Very present, and very much a real threat. It’s a great and deadly choice that he’s become the antagonist for this final (maybe?) installment in the trilogy.
Anyway… back to the scene.
Best part? Probably this: Walker ran a hand through his hair, chuckling; the elevator doors cracked open. “I doubt that. My reflexes have always been-”
“Absolutely nothing compared to mine.”
As Avery walks in like the cool, confident, suave, sexy man Sirel, Dana, Walker, Jamnis, and I all know. Oh yes, I said Walker and Jamnis. They have to be aware of Avery’s sexiness. Gods.
I know I’m jumping around a lot, but it’s hard to pick just a few things anymore to compliment. While it was … a dangerous move to make, I really liked that Dana stayed. I didn’t even think about the potential that Walker would have the gall to do something so violent in a restricted ward of a hospital, after he’d already been jailed for less violent harassment… So I’m really glad that she stayed. I don’t know if she did it because she feared for Avery, had a hunch, or just that she felt uneasy not KNOWING what Walker was doing but knowing he was in the vicinity. Either way. I know she got beat up. I know Avery got beat up more. And I know that, when it came to the elevator, Avery just about (and would have, had you not rethought your outline) lost it in a way that would have changed a lot of things (I’m thinking of Jamnis readjusting Avery’s Vampire anatomy). I think it’s also worth mentioning how much of a small comfort it was to see Avery trying to get Dana out of the situation, telling her more than once to leave. A good sign of his wanting to protect her, and very Jamnis-like.
You had very ….very good imagery for when Dana’s nose bled… I’m still shaking off shivers… I don’t like seeing other people’s blood, and if the description / imagery is real enough in movies or books, it makes my stomach flip. I don’t throw up, but it jolts me with tremors. Great freaking job (freaking because it wasn’t exactly a pleasant reader feeling, which means by the Law of Good Literature that it was pretty damn good).
And now I’m floundering because I don’t really have WORDS for what happened. I don’t even think I had words in the beta…just … written utterances that made no sense… It was really hard to read, and yet I definitely couldn’t turn away. For a little bit, the second time, I wondered what Walker meant by it being an “entirely wasted evening”. I think the thing he wants has to do with Ari. I could be wrong, but it’s about the only semi-logical conclusion I can make so far. But I do fully despise Walker. That much I do know.
It was at once horribly cruel of you to make him fulfill his bad-guy potential like he did, but very… good. It made me cringe, it made me yell from my chair. It made me think “No, no, he can’t do this! Why would he! He shouldn’t do this!” But of course, bad guys follow a different standard of morals, and I’ve already mentioned here what MAKES him such a good BAD GUY.
Finally…. *sighs* Avery. Avery, Avery, Avery… It makes such a difference KNOWING the kind of trouble he has with magic, and more importantly, the setup you have for this world, the interaction Vampires have with magic and energy auras, etc., is… wonderful and… I don’t know. A lot of writers have the tendency to allow their magic to be… unbounded and without consequence or counters, which makes for a dry, boring plot. Yours, however… well, here we’ve got one of my favorite sexy characters getting bashed into nearly biting our favorite main character, BECAUSE of the setup of magic, etc., you have. It works perfectly, it aids the plot, and that’s the way it SHOULD BE.
So back to Avery. This might seem obvious, but I loved how you test him in this chapter. I know you MEANT him to bite her, and it didn’t help that he promised to in Bad Blood… I could tell how hard it was without all the notes about Dana’s fear and panic in yet another violent elevator Vampire encounter – imagery like Avery clutching onto her even though he didn’t need to, especially if he was trying NOT to bite her, imagery that so showed instead of told. But I love this. He gets SO CLOSE to letting this physical / magic boundary and Walker push him into a hard, uncontrollable hunger, and it says something that he doesn’t do it. He doesn’t let Walker ‘win’. I like that. Especially since Walker is such a pig-faced naked mole rat of a person…Vampire. (Random, weird metaphor, but I didn’t feel like using a run-of-the-mill curse word for him. He deserves worse)
You ended the chapter perfectly, too. I know that at that point you weren’t sure if you were going to have Avery bite or not, but it still worked beautifully for suspense and as a chapter ending.
This is a great chapter… great and cruel and hard to read because of the knots it puts in my stomach when I read it… and my conclusion that Dana just needs to take Jujitsu or something. Jamnis, make her do it. _ I love it, and I’m onto either beta or review the next chapter (not sure which yet).
| RaelynRayne chapter 16 . 2/28/2009
I feel bad for Jamnis. Dana is always ending up in bad situations. I am very interested in finding out what Avery and Gavin are hiding.. Cannot wait to read more...