Reviews for The Caged Bird Heeds No Call
LilyWolfe chapter 5 . 10/15/2009
great story so far! was going to review right at the end but i've spotted a few typos that i thought might be easier for you to know about now, rather than in the end!

you seem to have a problem with it's and its, using the latter most of the time in place of it's.

same with your and you're but if you just read through you'll be able to catch them out quite easily (i know it's harder to spot when you've written it and are easy mistakes to make)

also this chapter you've written "and I really her laying on my lap incase" which is missing a word or two i think. and in case rather than incase.

will be reading on!
Insanity Found chapter 15 . 12/10/2008
damn it why are you soo fing good at writing stories!im gonna shank YOU this now we'll see who laghs last HA

HA told you i would get the last laugh. whatcha gonna do now!(ghostbusters!) -Þ
Insanity Found chapter 4 . 12/9/2008
lol maybe ill shank you back! oh dang im submitting a review. now i cant shank anybody -Þ. lol i love smileys
bulletcereal chapter 19 . 11/27/2008
i just completley loved this chapter. updtae, oh whoops, nm. but yah, i will look out for this story when it comes out again and also, i updated!
fatbird33 chapter 10 . 8/27/2008
super intense once again. demitri? another gasp. wow, you're good a surprises and keeping up the action nice. i've got to go for now, but that doesn't mean i'm done reading your story yet:)
fatbird33 chapter 9 . 8/27/2008
*gasp* *BIG GASP* OM! this is intense. not mike!
fatbird33 chapter 8 . 8/27/2008
oh drama drama. drama's fun.
fatbird33 chapter 7 . 8/27/2008
nice. i like the character development with Jaden in this chapter
fatbird33 chapter 6 . 8/27/2008
oo fire! excitment. i liked your last line again, it was funny. i don't know about the whole band thing. it seems that in such a strict society, it seems almost out of place. especially the words used in the song, i'd think the police would be all over that. i don't know that's just me. it's good though, keep it up.
fatbird33 chapter 5 . 8/27/2008
i personally always write in first person so it's easier for me to read as well, but thrid person doesn't bother me. again great descriptions, i liked the whole friend bit. olala tina keyes. i liked the last line of this chapter cute
fatbird33 chapter 4 . 8/27/2008
nice twist! that'd be crazy if he joined the police and full of DRAMA!
fatbird33 chapter 3 . 8/27/2008
funny little author note at the end:) you do a great job with descriptions and finding powerful words for them. nice job. uh-oh caught YIKES! you know what this kind of reminds me of? have you ever read 1984? boring book, this is so much better
fatbird33 chapter 2 . 8/27/2008
this was super intense. nice work. i loved it. great descriptions. i liked the line "he shot, and in an instant i became an orphan" nice. also what the man said, "what? can't find your mommy" o, so evil! anyways, keep it up
fatbird33 chapter 1 . 8/27/2008
Nice. This is good because it's actually plausable.
darkelegance10 chapter 18 . 3/16/2008
your style is really good in this chapter. I think you write violence well. lol.

Part 3 was the best. Honestly i think this is the best thing I've read from you so far. Have you thought of publishing it?
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