Reviews for The Unseen World
SilverTwilight chapter 4 . 8/2/2008
I take back what I said in my last review. I was tired, and skimmed over the story without really taking it in. As a previous commenter said, you have a mature writing style and this is a very well-developed story. I've been so desperately researching the possibility of other planes lately and I am really itching for the next part of this. The descriptions of the Soviet Union at this time are incredibly well-done. I really felt the trapped feeling you were expressing. Seriously, go get this published. I would buy it.


Also, I am shamelessly advertising here, just to let you know that I've added another part to my Death Is A Dream story, and would really appreciate your thoughts on it. It is not nearly as sophisticated as this, though, so don't be too harsh on me.


persephone jones chapter 4 . 12/18/2007
wow! well done, I really like it.
cassandra12271 chapter 4 . 12/15/2007
Do me a favor. Take this story off the internet and publish this. You're over eighteen, so publish it.
DreamBubble chapter 4 . 12/14/2007
Oh, the plot thickens. I love your metaphoric philosophies. D
DreamBubble chapter 3 . 12/14/2007
I loved this chapter. I loved these quotes: "But I was once taught that values cannot be murdered; they are reincarnated into other forms." and "...if the elders didn't see fit to believe in the power of the monuments, one would have to suffer for THEIR disbelief...sounds like my country to me..." Keep writing!
cassandra12271 chapter 3 . 12/10/2007
Nice details of the communist Russia. Even before they were a commumistic society, it still was the same because the absolute monarchy still treated them the same, so it wasn't a glorious and prosperous place (for example Bloody Sunday). Did you live in Russia? You seem to know a great deal about the communist Russia. I love the idea about the monuments and the altar. So, we are going on a mystical journey to save Russia. I hate it when you put in a cliffhanger. So hurry up and update soon! I'm impatient to find out what happens next!
cassandra12271 chapter 2 . 12/8/2007
Awesome chapter! I like the story! You are very detailed. You write like Stephen Crane. It was mean of them to arrest his mother because she said that the government was unjust. I hope you update soon! Rock on!
DreamBubble chapter 2 . 12/8/2007
Keep continuing. It's getting VERY interesting. I had no idea that people had it so bad in the Soviet.
DreamBubble chapter 1 . 11/24/2007
The concept is very interesting about an inner spirit world. And with that, to make the story take place in communist Russia, very abstract. Please continue. I would like to read more. D
cassandra12271 chapter 1 . 11/23/2007
Chuppie is right. Nice chapter! Great job!
SilverTwilight chapter 1 . 11/23/2007
The concept is so powerful, and a wonderful idea. I feel like this beginning is too abrupt, though. Maybe you could develop the setting a little more before jumping into the adventure. I await the next part.

chuppie chapter 1 . 11/23/2007
I'm coming out of my skin. This first chapter that you have written is absolutely fantastic. I can see you've put a lot of time and effort into developing this story line, and I encourage you to keep writing. Eventually this is something that could be published- and I believe it should. You have a very mature writing style, and it will carry you places. Keep up the great work. -Chuppie