Reviews for Him I love
kyox88 chapter 1 . 5/3/2009
your writing style is very unique, and never fail to amazed me! well done!
SweetWithUncertainty chapter 1 . 3/6/2008
your writing style never ceases to amaze me
HauntedMisery chapter 1 . 2/4/2008
This is amazingly well written. I love it ]
Her Wishing Well chapter 1 . 1/29/2008
This is, in every way, gorgeous. Your use of langauge and the way you express moments so powerfully will never cease to amaze me. Amazing, truly.
White Tea and Ginger chapter 1 . 12/29/2007
I like this. I love how full of contradiction it is- wanting him to see, hiding what you want him to see, the whole of it. This bit just really struck me: "in the apartment/as day bursts out/your cheek is/melting across/my neck."

Clearly a very intimate, sensual night; the delicacy you use in this piece is beautiful and definitely allows that intimacy to shine through, and yet at the same time doesn't fully give it all away. It's still yours, but we're thankful that you shared a slice of it with us.

Hillary.
Doc Blood chapter 1 . 12/24/2007
The emotional flow of this is amazing. Of course I am in awe of you, even when you make my brain hurt. And don't worry about the memory thing, old memories become more vivid with age. It's what one had for breakfast (or if one had breakfast) that becomes troublesome. Excellent.

Peace, Doc
simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 12/24/2007
I like this.. it flows beautifull and its wonderfully written.. a beautiful combonation of sweet and sad
hardcore chapter 1 . 12/24/2007
cresting like a tide

underneath my

tongue.

That's beautiful. One of my favorites of yours so far: I love the almost ethereal quality of this piece, taking place within as much as without. And very nicely set, you got me from the first verse!
S.L. Haze chapter 1 . 12/23/2007
"my voice

laughing

your name.

the way I cling

to the thought of you

against me. alone,

always thinking of it,

and now,

in the silence

sighing from it.

him I love

in the apartment;

in the sunlight

before he leaves me;

poised like a portrait

trying to remember

the feeling

before

I

forget

forever."

This makes me thinkof myself, exactly myself. Great work on this one!
Ayx chapter 1 . 12/23/2007
This was beautiful. One of the most moving pieces I've read in a very long while. Wow...great from stanza to stanza. Lol I think you've blown me away with your talent.

Ayx
Julius Gillian chapter 1 . 12/23/2007
I like how straightforward this is. This piece is written in an honest way, so is the concept about loving this person and making love to him.

'in the apartment

moonshine whines

across the windows

like a screaming

siren'

Moonshine whining is very abstract, and it took me a few moments to guess what this means. To have something 'whine' across a surface seems to me like its making itself known by force. And I guess by writing 'screaming siren' emphasizes just that. I recall you wrote in your previous poems 'screaming silence or loud silence'. Were you aware of that when you flipped this around or is it just me? It's interesting that you've used a succinct but articulate pair of words which I'm already familar with. Which again reminds me how straightforward and honest this piece is.

'I

love

him'

Honest :P

'and in my shame,

pale, and nude I

fumble,

press him

closer to

my skin

in our love

making - to

feel him

transcribe my body

into a poem,'

Call me strange, but this brief stanza feels like the poetess' body to me being painted by her lover. You've accomplished a great deal with molding yourself into this part if you know what I mean.

'in the apartment

as day bursts out

your cheek is

melting across

my neck.'

melting to me reminds me of slow motion in contrast to bursts which represents busy activity. Seems like you guys are taking it slow and easy and just enjoying the moment. Love this part too.

'a spark, inertia,

eyeliner: bony

fingers cupping

my breasts while

you stare me down

saying

nothing.'

Aws :)

'before

I

forget

forever.'

Well unless you have a diary. I think some memories just wont go away no matter how many other things you become conditioned to, no matter how long you live, or deny it. But then again maybe I need to confront what I'm trying to forget and move on. Ho hum.

This was a very serene piece Juliet, and I have to remark again how simplistic your style here is.

Congratulations, this deserves *cheesy cinema rating alert* a two thumbs up. ;)

- Julian