|Reviews for 1965|
| Leaving Fictionpress chapter 1 . 4/28/2008
This is really good. It has kind of a Bradbury feel to it. Nice use of suspense at the end.
| AboveAndBelow chapter 1 . 12/31/2007
Wow,I actually got a little nervous, if you can, read this story listening to 'Fault Line' by Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, it fits the story well.
| sugarplumfairie chapter 1 . 12/30/2007
Wow. This is great. When I was reading it, I got all scared, I even had goosebumps. How scary. Thank god I'm female.
| Honey Nut Loop and m-j chapter 1 . 12/26/2007
Very intriguing and very interesting. I'd read more if it was here. I thought the second half flowed better than the first.
Two pieces of advice:
1. Avoid elaborate speech tags (concluded/instructed/quipped. More often than not said alone is the best way forward. Said is an invisible word that tells the reader who is speaking without the reader realising. The words themselves should explain how they are spoken.
2. You're on the cusp of 'as you know, Bob' with some of the conversation at the begining. 'As you know, Bob' is when characters tell each other information they both already know. You get away with it for the most part because of the particular emotion you are trying to convey.I think you might have gone a bit too far with the history of ktulu however. Maybe it would be better to mention him and then have your nameless MC remember the story?