Bravo! Well done for writing this. I hope some of the writers here take the time to read it, and hopefully take notice.

Thank you so much for writing this! I am so frustrated with the amount of unrealistic and badly written stories that I come across. ESPECIALLY THE YOUR AND YOU'RE MISTAKES FRUSTRATE ME A ,thanks for voicing out and ranting on this XD

Haha, I totally agree! I love FictionPress, but so many of the people who use it are idiots. I once read a story where, instead of describing actions like a normal person, the author used asterisks just like:
*watch beeps*
The quality of writing on this site disgusts me, sometimes.
And I know what you mean by wanting to help by giving harsh criticism. It's always hard to stay courteous and give constructive feedback at the same time.
Stay awesome!

-Snowflake

I face this problem everyday. This was so apt, it made me cry.

Oohfnkd, I think you described most of my thoughts in pretty much all this.. The only thing missing is the there, their, they're.. The you're/your my brain already stopped registering (sad reality and I'm not even English raised) ahaha!
The commentary in the middle of a story usually makes me think that the author wants to be included in the reading process.. Meybe they feel alone?
You have a rant mine gold here, ahhha! XD
Resisting the urge to rant endlessly,
Hanna.

Thank you for posting this. Seriously, thank you. Every single aspect of this piece hit base on issues with poorly written works that bug me to death, and I hope a few who do read this learn from their mistakes. Needless to say, I'll go read some of your other works and your favourited works, as well.

I love your reviews on the stories but just one thing. Regarding the "falling in love super quickly" thing, in your story "Caller Unknown", they fell in like or love the first time they actually met face to face? Personally I have nothing against it and I love that One Shot but...

Hey, I really love this! What you said were true. It gets pretty boring when there's a lot of error in the story. And I myself don't appreciate blabbers about the appearance whatsoever of the characters. Haha.

I'm a writer (trying hard, actually) so this will help me on my writing in the near future. Thanks. :)

By the way, I salute you for luring me here (putting this under Fiction and all that, haha).

(I'm not sure if you will spot my review but well,) Bye and good day!

This is so true, and extremely helpful to read. If only more people would read it! All of your points highlighted are things I have read many a time so I hope this gets noticed more. Thank you for the tips!

You didn't waste my time at all. :)

Ahahahaha, this was brilliant. I used to visit this site religiously back in high school, but I'm only starting to get back into it again and I'm noticing a lot more things now that I did before. Nobody's perfect and there's always room for improvement, but the things you stated are just some of my biggest pet peeves when trying to find stories on here. Thanks for the laugh, you're hilariously blunt and it's awesome 3

AHAHAHA, damn, my favorite written-by-myself story starts with a waking up moment. I feel stupid now. :P

Anyway, I really agree with you about the grammar thing... I'm surprised you didn't mention the new-line-for-each-new-speaker rule.

Well said, all of it. I do, however, disagree with you when you say that boys can't fall in love with girls in third grade. You're right when you say that said boy could not have known he was in love with a girl at that age, but he could realize, years later, that he must have been in love with her since then. It could start out as a simple crush (in third grade) and then turn into something more.

Thanks for writing this rant!

THANK YOU. I now know I am not the only person out there who wonders these things.

I personally am terrible at grammar and spelling but I hardly ever (unless it's a typo really) mess up the things that you pointed out. However, I'd love to play devil's advocate on a few things.

Counter Exhibit B:
"Cuz" can be an appropriate replacement for "cousin" in dialogue or in the main character's personal thoughts

Counter Exhibit C:
The cloudiness of coming to consciousness overtook me. The dreams dripped away, and the moment I was aware of my predicament my mind froze with fear.
I was waking up. One does not wake up unless she was asleep. I look over to the other person in the room relieved to find him sleeping as well. With luck, he was never awake while I wasn't. I berated myself for doing something so careless as to fall asleep in the presence of another. I hadn't made that mistake in years and for good reason. My sleep is thick. You'd think that after years of being on the run, constantly at risk that I'd become so light a sleeper that the slightest of sounds. It was truly an enigma. Even scarier is the fact I talk in my sleep. Once this was a childhood embarrassment, now it could but my life in danger.
So the fact that I had been asleep was terrifying. The fact that I fell asleep in front of a recently kidnapped (by me) prince was, well, mind numbing

An (hopefully) interesting beginning with a "waking up scene"

Counter Exhibit D:
I am not going to write a piece for this but boys Can (I capitalize this because I can't put it in italics) fall in-love when they are but wee ickle ones. Sometimes they treat the girl the "like-like" like crap for years until they realizes that the annoying feelings they have for the respective love-interest is Not loathing. Other times the girl is the boy's childhood best friend that he has always loved and when he hits puberty the needed lust factor kicks in and he is in-love with her. This happens. It's rare maybe but that's probably why the reader was interested in the first place.

Counter Exhibit E:
1. Jack was one of those guys that thought he was "the shiz" because he wore advertisements for shirts. There wasn't a thing in his closet that didn't say "American Eagle" , or the like, across it. He really ought to be payed for all his work as a walking billboard.
2. Louisa and Thomas were fighting again. The same fight they had every day. Which was the better shoe 'Converse' or 'Vans' ? Someday I am going to join in and claim "Toms" to be supreme just to see the looks of their faces.

Appropriate use of brand names. I hate them in stories too, but here they just make the stories sound more dated.

Counter Exhibit F:
I saw something attacking me out of the corner of my eye and ducked the ambush. Donovan looked at me like I was crazy as my attacker fell in front of my eyes. A fat blond curl had made me fear for my life. Again.
Alisha told me my eyes were nice. I can't fathom why she'd think that. My irises faded from their once brilliant blue long ago. What was so great about the lifeless gray they were now?

Sometimes introducing physical appearance early in a piece is NOT corny at all. Unless you think I am a horrid writer and I of my counterpoints were a waste of time, I think I have made my opinion clear. ;)