|Reviews for waiting|
| BalletManiac chapter 1 . 2/6/2008
I really really liked your poem!
In the beginning when you said 'And my fingers ache from the tugging' I went .. OH YEAH ! That happens ! Nice observation !
The line where you say 'With bored feet, distracting my mind' I stopped to think about what you mean.. I didn't understand it quiet well. Do you mean that your tapping your feet? It could be just me lol..
Heart thumps to its own tune and
My feet mark out a broken pattern
| person is gone chapter 1 . 2/5/2008
Nice Very nice. Could've fit as just a normal story-like-description-thinger too, but 'tis fine as a poem. I was wondering what it was leading up to - the ending made me smile XD
Just one stylish note; all the descriptions are great and you really get a feeling of what's going on, just the line, "With bored feet, distracting my mind" - 'bored' seems not to fit in with the rest, which is all anxiety. Were you meaning restless?