|Reviews for Salt and Sepia Tone|
| Solemn Coyote chapter 1 . 2/25/2008
Kinda found my way back to your writing. I figure I owe you a few more reviews. Plus, there's the added benefit of I like your writing. Anyways,
1) This is a really good emotional canvas of the emotions that a crush wakes up. I like that it doesn't just take one approach. It binds together a lot of different sentiments, then presents them as one poem.
2) That said, I think "On the Merits of Power" was my favorite out of all of them. "close your eyes/the stars are getting jealous" is so pointed. It's like a little landmine, hidden in the grammar at the end of the poem.
3) There's just a small bit of word-repetition in "Smile", maybe. 'smoothness' appears twice. It's not a major detail, and I'm not even sure it throws off the flow. It's just worth noting, because this poem is hard to critique and I'll take whatever it offers me.
4) "Flash Flood" is as good an opening as "On the Merits of Power" is a conclusion. The poem starts immediate and raw. Plus, I think I know the emotion you mean there. The imagery really strikes a chord with me.
5) I definitely liked this, overall. I wouldn't feel right critiquing emotions, but they came through really clear. I hope that whoever this was written for gets a chance to read it some day.
| Broken Spiral chapter 1 . 2/5/2008
That was epic.