|Reviews for Moon River|
| CassandraRose526 chapter 1 . 1/9/2010
This was a really amazing story. There was a genuineness . . . a raw realness to this story that's very hard to find. I also love the way it was written and even how in the end, you changed it to include quotation marks. I liked the parallel issues of a father who had left and a mother who had died. And Conner's attempts to make a dinner for Boris and Pen. The whole period issue was both funny and sad. Amazing job writing this . . . I loved it! Thank you so much for sharing it with us all.
| Cydnee199 chapter 1 . 12/29/2009
This... This is incredible. I loved it. I feel very satisfied and emotional(?) after reading this- I thought it was brilliant. Your way of writing is different and awesome and memorable.
I think my favorite line is "She was the goddamn hunter and gatherer."
and the interaction(s) between Boris and Connor [the punch-in-the-eye bit was fantastic]
| Sycelia chapter 1 . 12/15/2009
All I can say is -
This site is too small for writing like this.
Movies and books never ever make me cry but I think that if they did, this one probably would have.
I love the characters and the way you described them - made them imperfect but perfect for each other, I love the language you used. And I absolutely love this story.
Thank you so much for writing this. (:
| SandmanCircus chapter 1 . 12/13/2009
wow, that was amazing
| iBrandi chapter 1 . 10/1/2009
Aw, this was beautiful. I loved how you managed to show the characters so clearly, in all their flaws and insecurities, even though the writing style was so poetic and sometimes kind of abstract. The whole piece had a great flow to it. I enjoyed all the classical allusions as well, and the little feminist tibdits thrown in there - feminism is a rare thing on this website, haha. I really, really enjoyed this, it's one of the most well-written pieces I've seen on fictionpress.
| hydrocancellation chapter 1 . 8/29/2009
*whisper* Wow. Never thought that a light-hearted stories author like yourself have such a deep insight on matters like that. I feel the bitter sweet of your message. It tugged at me and all I am capable of is sob while empathizing with you. But secretly, I'm not one for Angst. Yet, I'm going to read this again and understand it better. Oh, and good job on the headings at every interval. I like the originality of this story. Care to explain what is up with Conner? Is he an emotionally unstable boy who had lost his mother and gets drunk to drink off his sorrows? I have to admit that I took a very long time to finish reading this story while struggling to understand what you're implying. It's so...in depth? Haha.
| its.Nothing.Special chapter 1 . 7/1/2009
I have no words. There are no words. You wrote them all. THIS FASCINATED ME AND IT'S TOO AMAZING FOR THIS SITE. Have you read Ceremony by Leslie Marmon Silko? This reminded me of that - something ancient and intelligent and cultural and mystifying yet altogether modern. (It's Native American. It's beautiful. Maybe when you get published - hmm, tomorrow sound good? - you guys can compete or something.)
p.s. the dashes instead of quotes thing is pretty classy. read a book like that once but I can't remember what it is. except the dashes were everywhere, not just flashbacks. okay. being pointless because you made all the points.
p.p.s. this is the kind of story that deserves to be read again and again for the rest of your life, just to make sure you got everything. it deserves to be appreciated - man, it deserves to be APPRECIATED. so nuanced and so pure and so heartbreaking and so...I'm in love with you.
| Anon chapter 1 . 6/12/2009
Your words are...the essence of what meaning in a story should be. They make me sit and think and second guess and wish I were smarter and motivate me to get out and be better.
The depth in your stories is astounding, and I truly think you should consider getting published. Very few works affect me, and what I've read from you is something very powerful.
Your writing is beautiful with its depth and I love it.
| readernotwriter1 chapter 1 . 6/12/2009
i love how u ended this story :) good one
| bookbound chapter 1 . 6/6/2009
This is quite possibly the most beautiful thing I have ever read on this site. Thank you for writing it. First of all, nerd that I am, there are no mistakes grammatically. None. You tweak the language and its constraints to fit your story and style, but there are no mistakes. More importantly, this is simply freaking brilliant. I feel like it is the happier (ironically) version of 'Eveline' - of course you had the transparent allusion in the beginning, but once you gave me that I saw parallels throughout, particularly in the relationship with her father (remembering mostly the bad, but also the good). And I love that Pen made the decision Eveline could not, and also that Connor did not force her onto the metaphorical boat, but that she really made the move.
| Haeloed chapter 1 . 5/31/2009
i have never read anything like this before and i love it. this style of writing drew me in from the start and i cant imagine how hard it might have been to write.
well done and congrats on a great story
| Juneaux chapter 1 . 4/4/2009
| smile at the sun chapter 1 . 3/16/2009
Absolutely beautiful. One of the greatest short stories I've ever read, I loved Pen and Connor and Boris, too. I liked the style, the allusions, and moon river. This was so real- their emotions, and fear, and how you wrote them falling for each other. great writing.
| bri chapter 1 . 3/5/2009
ohgodohgodohgod... SO BEAUTIFUL! this has my skow vote, def. :D
| Hyperroll chapter 1 . 3/3/2009
thank you for writing this.