Reviews for Gibberish
Esther Jade chapter 1 . 3/11/2008
Review game!

I like the second stanza. The alliteration and assonance of the first line create nice rhythm and I found the enjambment really effective as well. I also found this was the stanza that really strick a chord with me.

I wasn't as fond of the other stanzas, possibly they didn't talk into my live as much. Also, you can have "l" on the end of "clever" that I think is a typo.

I really like the closing line, though. It's such a lovely, almost ironic touch.
Kyllorac chapter 1 . 3/11/2008
A thank you for your review. n.n

I think a more irregular and informal line length would be better for this poem. There is no particular rhythm that each of the lines follows, and some of the lines change rhythm suddenly.

In particular, the third line of the first stanza threw me off because its rhythm suddenly changes mid-line. Instead of using "and tap," tapping would be a better choice since it doesn't disrupt the line's rhythm.

You're missing a "y" at the end of "cleverl".

I like your use of Italian and French at the end. It gives this poem that special extra touch. You also portray the situation and emotions very well. Overall, very nice. n.n
a certain slant of light chapter 1 . 3/11/2008
How very true. French is such a b*tch, isn't it? I take it that the last two lines are written in italian and french - I did recognise the French, I'm not that bad ;P I especially like the second stanza, that's my favorite one. Very nicely done!